Random Monday Ramblings

As i start this i realize that i do not have a song picked out for my traditional Musical Monday fare... blame it on getting up early to go the gym... blame it on me not taking my Strattera this morning... but in the end the maximum effective range of an excuse is zero (0) meters. I was just not prepared for my traditional Monday offering. As i type this i am praying that God will open up the Heavens and shine a light down on me... and thus reveal THE song to use for today. Until then... enjoy some random Monday ramblings... Ok, i know i've mentioned this before... but unless the Panthers can get their starting 22 positions healthy in time for the regular season... it may be a looooonnngggg season for this Panthers fan. I am not talking 1-15 long, but perhaps 6-10 long... I have a ton of faith in Coach Fox, and i have seen him pull out victory from the jaws of defeat. I would not put it past him to have not really put his team into all that high of a game frenzy, but when the 1:00 PM comes on 13-September, i am going to be wearing my Panther Blue heart on my sleeve! Coach - i know i've said all i want for Christmas is a 9-7 season - but you do what you got to do to get this team into the playoffs! One thing i would like to point out... for at least the past 2 weeks Coach Fox has been working without of all of his starting running backs and wide receivers. It's hard to see if the offense is clicking when those key positions are out, and the offensive line has not taken all that many snaps together. My one real concern is at the Run defense side of things. Until Carolina picks up a DT to replace Kemoeatu they are going to be hard pressed to stop the run... and when teams can run on you it wears you down. Yesterday i went down to visit my co-worker, who is also a living example of what it means to be a husband who serves and takes care of his wife. A few years back his wife had a serious car accident that broke her neck and she became a quadriplegic. Since then this man has taken a very first hand track to her care. When i was interviewed for his clearance i was asked if the man had any hobbies and my answer to them sums it up. His wife IS his hobby. He has wired his house with an automatic generator so that if there is a commercial power outage he can run all of her medical equipment plus he can still heat the house and he still has a mostly functional kitchen. He went out and purchased an RV and then had it renovated so that they can still take vacations to visit their son and grand children. He not only has taken a first hand role in learning how to care for his wife, he has paid for a lot of the equipment and part time care givers out of his own pocket because his medical insurance, either does not - or will not, pay for it. This man is a modern day hero to me. I went to visit them because she is in the hospital. She has developed a very large kidney stone and it has become septic. It grew so large because she doesn't feel any pain and by the time there were any external signs it was so. I would ask for prayers from those who read this... she is in the critical cardiac unit of his local hospital. She has been fighting hard, and there are positive signs, but she is far from out of the woods yet. They still need to go and get the stone out... This man has been a source of encouragement in my walk with Christ... and he continues to fight alongside her bed. I miss our talks at work (even the times when it would appear i am not really listening), and i am praying for them to come again. Have you ever ordered tea at a restaurant and gotten that weird after taste? I LOVE iced tea and can pretty much drink it by the bucket load... but when you get a mouthful of tea that has been sitting at room temperature over night... wow. A coworker and i take turns making a 3qt pitcher of the stuff to share day in and day out... but i don't know what it is... the tea first thing Monday is nasty ~ if it's been left over from the previous Friday that is! Here at work i can understand how the tea got that way. There is no one to drink it over the weekend, but in a restaurant there is no excuse! Simply empty the container out at night, wash it out, and make a fresh batch first thing in the morning. Simple. On Saturday i took DS1 out to the Antietam National Battlefield to watch an artillery demonstration. Very nice! There is a group of volunteers who have been meeting once per month to practice and this was the first month the battlefield set up the demonstration. There are hopes to expand it to having two demonstration crews... one Union and one Confederate. There is a real part of me that wants to step up and volunteer out there for this, but for now i am enjoying my weekends just as they are. Maybe someday in the future. For me the highlight was learning about John Cook. He was a Bugler for Battery B, 2nd U.S. Artillery. During the battle Battery B suffered more than 40% casualties, and at one point this young man of 15 stepped up and manned the guns and performed valiantly - for which he was given the Congressional Medal of Honor. I am not good at telling stories, nor do i remember all that they shared with us, but this young man definitely earned it that day. Ok... i need to wrap this up, but i wanted to share that i am going to be a tennis widower once again. For the next two weeks the U.S. Open will be going on and my beloved LOVES tennis. Which i whole heatedly encourage her to pursue. I enjoy tennis too. But my 'passion' is the NFL... and the Carolina Panthers in particular (in case you had not gleaned that from my blog yet). I have an outstanding request for all birthday, anniversary, and Christmas presents... anything Panthers. LOL This morning i had an ad in my e-mail in-box advertising personalized Panthers Jerseys - even pink ones this year (pictured right). My beloved would never wear such a thing because my passion is not her passion. I have a friend who's wife is as big a football fan (she the Washington Redskins, he the Pittsburgh Steelers) so i have to confess there are times i am jealous that they share such interests. Even though my beloved does not share my passion for football, we do share one passion though ~ food. She loves to make it... and i love to eat it! In closing... God has been working on my heart and ears of late. Trying to relearn how to listen and hear His promptings... to discern His voice over the din of the world... and that one cannot pilot a ship through the ocean alone.

Therefore, brothers, [3] since we have confidence to enter the holy places by the blood of Jesus, by the new and living way that he opened for us through the curtain, that is, through his flesh, and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, with our hearts sprinkled clean from an evil conscience and our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near. For if we go on sinning deliberately after receiving the knowledge of the truth, there no longer remains a sacrifice for sins, but a fearful expectation of judgment, and a fury of fire that will consume the adversaries. Anyone who has set aside the law of Moses dies without mercy on the evidence of two or three witnesses. How much worse punishment, do you think, will be deserved by the one who has spurned the Son of God, and has profaned the blood of the covenant by which he was sanctified, and has outraged the Spirit of grace? For we know him who said, “Vengeance is mine; I will repay.” And again, “The Lord will judge his people.” It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God. But recall the former days when, after you were enlightened, you endured a hard struggle with sufferings, sometimes being publicly exposed to reproach and affliction, and sometimes being partners with those so treated. For you had compassion on those in prison, and you joyfully accepted the plundering of your property, since you knew that you yourselves had a better possession and an abiding one. Therefore do not throw away your confidence, which has a great reward. For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God you may receive what is promised. For, “Yet a little while, and the coming one will come and will not delay; but my righteous one shall live by faith, and if he shrinks back, my soul has no pleasure in him.” But we are not of those who shrink back and are destroyed, but of those who have faith and preserve their souls. (Hebrews 10:19-39, ESV)

I am thinking 9-7 may be a stretch at this point

For those who may not know by now, i am a fan of the Carolina Panthers. I had grown up a fan of the Washington Redskins, but that was only because both my father and mother where fans. I was never 'fanatical' if you were, so after i got married and learned that the NFL was going to expand the league by two more teams i decided that which ever one was in the NFC, that would be my team. Maybe not a scientific method, but it's the one i went with. So, in 1995 my (new) team finally took the field and nearly won the very first outing losing to the Atlanta Falcons 20-23. Since then i have seen my team make it to the NFC Championship three times, but in all that time my team has never had back to back winning seasons. I have suffered through the 1-15 season and i have had my hopes dashed a few times. Last year all i wanted for Christmas was an NFC South Championship and the Cats delivered! This year all i want for Christmas is a 9-7 season. I know that sounds backwards, but it would be a real nice moment for me to know they could do it. Unfortunately, the injury bug has been biting the Panthers this pre-season and now my dream seems like a long shot. Who know... not many picked the Panthers to win the NASCAR division (in the toughest division of the NFL no less - the NFC South of 2008 set the record for the both the most # of wins and the highest winning percentage of an entire division). Who knows... anything can happen. And the games that matter don't start for another eighteen days ~ at least not for the Panthers. There will be four games i know i will get to see this year:

28-Sept - @ the Dallas Cowboys - Monday night game

11-Oct - hosting the Washington Redskins - i know this is a Sunday game, but the local Fox station plays either the Redskins or some other NFC East division. The Cowboys should move to the NFC South and Carolina should move to the East if you ask me.

19-Nov - hosting the Miami Dolphins on a Thursday night game. I might have to go to a friend's house who has the NFL network though.

20-Dec - hosting the Minnesota Vikings.

This will be the most games that i've ever been able to watch in the regular season so i am pretty excited about that. God knows how well (or not) the Panthers will do this season. In the meantime i am just stoked that the regular season is around the corner. I just want to watch some meaningful football again! Since i am a geek, and my old cell phone is dieing a slow pitiful death (and annoying me as it drops calls, loses memory, and the battery seems to fade if i go out of the area for more than 15 minutes) i decided to replace both my, and my beloved's cell phone. I was unsure of exactly which phone i wanted to get, but then the Samsung Reclaim caught my eye. With some discounts and concessions i was able to pic it up for a good price. But for me the selling point was that i could get it in Ocean (i.e. Carolina) Blue. LOL This Saturday i am going to head out to the Antietam National Battlefield to see a Civil War artillery demonstration. Hopefully there will be some pictures to share next week. I've sent out a Facebook invite to all of my Artillery buddies, and a few of them said they will be there, some are unsure... but it will be nice to do/watch something Artillery again. It will be the first time i will be able to break out my new walking stick. This past week has been a blur, but the other night i believe God may have given me an idea as to how to approach writing the letter to Sovereign Grace Ministries regarding my interest in them (hopefully) doing a church plant in my area. Of course, since then both my personal and professional time has been crazy busy. I've kept the ideas alive in my noggin' and hope to write the letter VERY soon.

Music Monday Deffered

What a couple of days... On Saturday i drove almost 500 miles round trip so that i could attend my "Aunt's" "Celebration of Life" ceremony. It was both a very joyful and very somber ceremony. I had the opportunity to see relatives i had not seen in a long time. Some as long as 30 years! For me it was more of a way to show how much that all too brief summer meant to me. I told my three surviving cousins, as well as my "Uncle" (they were all actually my cousins, but it seemed appropriate and respectful to call them 'Aunt' and 'Uncle') that it was the best summer of my childhood... and it truly was. I remember the walks down the local college, the walks around town. When my younger brother tried chewing tobacco and got so sick... the chores... the goodie bags my "Aunt" made up for us on Sundays that had to last all week... i had never wanted it to end. It was my Aunt's wish that the ceremony be one of celebration and not mourning. She was known as a woman of details as her oldest daughter so eloquently spoke of. She had chosen four songs to be played (one of which i used below). Afterward we had a mini luau. This summer has been a little more... strained... for lack of a better word coming readily to mind. My beloved's on-going health problems, my "aunt", a little 5 year old girl at my former church being diagnosed with Leukemia, another church member lost her mother and then her husband a week later, my co-worker's wife is in the hospital with severe issues... all told i really do not feel that it has been all that bad... but it can add up. So when we sang "It is Well With My Soul" it really struck a cord in my heart...

It Is Well with My Soul by Horatio G. Spafford When peace, like a river, attendeth my way, when sorrows like sea billows roll; whatever my lot, thou hast taught me to say, It is well, it is well with my soul. Refrain: It is well with my soul, it is well, it is well with my soul. Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come, let this blest assurance control, that Christ has regarded my helpless estate, and hath shed his own blood for my soul. (Refrain) My sin, oh, the bliss of this glorious thought! My sin, not in part but the whole, is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more, praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul! (Refrain) And, Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight, the clouds be rolled back as a scroll; the trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend, even so, it is well with my soul.

It is always good to remind myself that no matter what happens here on Earth my ultimate security, my ultimate provision, lies not in this world. "And just as it is appointed for man to die once, and after that comes judgment..." (Hebrews 9:27 ESV) To some that may not be a comfort... but to those who know, and are known by, Christ it means there ever after being in Heaven with Him.

"And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Behold, the dwelling place [1] of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be his people, [2] and God himself will be with them as their God. [3] He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.”" (Revelation 21:3-4, ESV)

What more could a soul desire?

Floundering Friday

This weekend was supposed to be one of recuperation from my beloved's surgery, but life never sleeps. A while back i mentioned that an "Aunt" had passed away and tomorrow is the memorial service. It is almost a four hour tour of the Shenandoah Valley - my most favorite place in the world. I am planning on a "day" trip - i.e. i get up, make the trip down, attend the memorial service, visit with family for a spell, and then hop in the car for the return trip. It will make for a long day, but one well worth it. I may not be 'tight' with most of my family (a failing on my part), but this woman made a real difference in my life. That summer with my cousins was a turning point in my life if you ask me. I still cherish the memories. So, even though i really need a long weekend with just my own brood, i need to make this trip. If for nothing else than to celebrate my "Aunt's" life and reconnect with family. Especially the cousins that made such a difference in my life. Tomorrow the Panthers will be heading to Miami for game 2 of the preseason. I never read anything into these practice games. But i do like to watch them when i get a chance. It gives me a sense of seeing how the players react, etc. Still, no one is moving really at game speed except the 2nd string and below. It's almost like the later in the game the more true effort you see. With the trip tomorrow i've tried to look up some of the radio stations between point A and B to see if i might be able to catch much of the game broadcast... do they even broadcast pre-season games? I know during the season i can get an AM skip station that i leave preset on my car radio. Sad, i know. My beloved has been downcast since her parents left. It's not because they left but because of how things ended, and i know i did not really help things all that much. It does not matter how right i thought my contributions might have been ~ timing is everything. We have a saying in the Artillery... once you pull the lanyard you can't bring the round back. It means you need to do all of your 'pre-fire' checks BEFORE you pull the lanyard... and i did not really do so well in regards to relating with my wife in regards to the situation with her parents. All i can do now is try and stay near... For me spiritually, i am going to be diving back into Romans. I feel like i can SO relate to Romans 7:

I was once alive apart from the law, but when the commandment came, sin came alive and I died. The very commandment that promised life proved to be death to me. For sin, seizing an opportunity through the commandment, deceived me and through it killed me. So the law is holy, and the commandment is holy and righteous and good. Did that which is good, then, bring death to me? By no means! It was sin, producing death in me through what is good, in order that sin might be shown to be sin, and through the commandment might become sinful beyond measure. For we know that the law is spiritual, but I am of the flesh, sold under sin. For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. Now if I do what I do not want, I agree with the law, that it is good. So now it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. So I find it to be a law that when I want to do right, evil lies close at hand. For I delight in the law of God, in my inner being, but I see in my members another law waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members. Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself serve the law of God with my mind, but with my flesh I serve the law of sin.

I have been getting down on myself for not being more disciplined. Like i should be able to just say what i am going to do and do it! It's not like i am have to assemble a team, devise a plan, and then assault a building. *sigh* and yet it's not even that simple. "No battle plan ever survives contact with the enemy."

Racing around the circle of reasoning

For the past two days i've noticed something about myself... i am having trouble focusing on the tasks at hand. Some of it may just be that i got called into work in the middle of the night yesterday, but i've sort of felt this way before and me thinks i see a pattern. Yesterday i realized that i had forgotten to take my ADD meds the previous day and a half (since just before the in-laws left). Does anyone else find it funny that you have to remember to take a med that helps you focus and remember things? Isn't that like saying you have to paint the barn red, because the barn is red you need to paint it? Or something like that (i couldn't think of something more witty than that... sorry ). The kids will be starting school in the next week or so. What a pain for the parents too. We have to re-teach them to get up early, to make sure they get their homework done... stuff like that. DS1 is usually pretty good at self regulating, but DS2 starts middle school this year. It will be the first time he has had to switch classes and there will be a lot more homework. *sigh* Working with him on homework is like trying to self extract a tooth. Meanwhile DD3 has begun to self-teach. She has pulled out old workbooks and begun to practice doing homework, etc. Meanwhile she is getting excited about wanting to start up the Fall soccer games. She is very athletic but we just don't have the time and money to keep her involved in everything she wants to do... gymnastics, ballet, soccer, and horse riding. She has to make hard choices to pick and to choose. DS1 wants to run track this year, but we've been having a hard time getting any information from the school on it, and DS2 just wants to come home and do nothing (sort of). We try and keep them active without overwhelming the parents. The past week or two has been kind of refreshing. Not that i like to sweat, but it has finally felt like summertime around here. Temps in the 90's with high percentage humidity. I really don't like the dog days of summer, but it just hasn't felt like summer with temps in the 70's and mild humidity. When you've grown up in the Washington DC area there are just certain things you come to expect... and such weather is one of them. One thing that such weather usually brings is thunderstorms!, but even those have seemed mild this year. During my last Annual Training with the National Guard last year i had accidentally knocked over a small Ash Wood tree while moving into my unit's position. The CUCV had pushed it over to a 45° angle. Since i spent a lot of my time at the BOC when i was not out doing the 'beans, bodies, and bullets' part of being a First Sergeant, i went ahead and knocked it all the way over and cut it down to a comfortable walking stick size (just under my arm pit). Once i peeled off the bark (which was very easy, and very wet) and whittled down the raised portions i set it out to dry. The thing is amazingly hard. Since then i've gather up my old regimental crests, branch insignia, a set of Air Assault wings, and a Chaplin's cross. I need to finish sanding down the handle and polishing up the miniaturized brass, then get all the trinkets mounted. Once that is all done an nice thick lacquer coat. But i drag my feet so long. It's been sitting in my bedroom since the Spring! I am sure my beloved would like for me to finish it up and move it back out of the room. Maybe this weekend...

The Holiness of God

Late yesterday i went through all five short video's that i saw on Facebook by RC Sproul concerning the Holiness of God. Very good "stuff" to chew on. I had already planned to share them here today, but then life conspired that i should not get much sleep last night so i don't really have much more to share from my own thoughts... which is probably good as i can now stand aside and just let Mr Sproul speak...

Recovery

Last night i stayed up to watch the pre-season Monday Night Football game between the Carolina Panthers and the New York Giants. I am so tired my eyes hurt *chuckle*. For the most part i was not very happy with what i saw. The Giants were able to open holes large enough to drive a semi through without being touched, and the offense just couldn't move the ball very well. I am not giving up on the season, i am just not happy with what i was seeing last night. 9-7 is all i dare hope for this year. It is a meek goal on the part of a fan, and i know the official party line down at the Panthers training camp is they feel they can go all the way to Super Bowl XLIV, but let's be honest. The Panthers have never put together back to back winning seasons. For me... that is the next goal. The next is to win the division... then the Conference... then the Super Bowl. What an exciting end to a pre-season game though! It is only the pre-season though. Hope springs eternal! The in-laws have left as of this morning. They were extremely helpful watching over my beloved. Helping to get things done around the house, to include the repairing of two bathroom sinks, one dining room chair, the garage door opener, and all of the laundry dishes and meal making. It was immeasurable and i hope i conveyed that in my expression of thanks to them this morning. I have not been writing of late. Well, actually not since before the summer break began. As a result a lot of the ideas i had then are a little stale... and i even have ideas to change them up some. I still have the same five characters i had back then, but i am going to be changing one of them and adding one more. I still have all of my notes and outline... but i am trying to figure out how to incorporate the changes i want to make now. I also need to just get writing like my friend "Yeve". She has been typing up around 4,500 to 5,000 words a week! I am jealous and happy for her. Recently God has been bringing me through a "growing" season. I will not be more specific than that right now, but it has more to do with than just helping my beloved through her recovery from surgery. One thing remains the same though... i know of His faithfulness and i know that no matter how things play out in the next 5 days, 5 months, 5 years, and (hopefully) 5 decades, He will remain steadfast and that all things will work together to mold me into the image of Christ more and more. In closing i want to share a quote i read at a fellow 'Elf's' blog: "Know Scripture! How can one wield a sword poorly forged?" In essence we each are forging our own 'sword' in order to wield in our spiritual fight. It is forged as we read more and more into the Word of God. It becomes stronger the more we put our nose in His book, and suffers from neglect the more we avoid the things of God and His Word.

Music Monday - 20090817

There are times when i feel really, really small. This is a good thing because these are the times i am reflecting on the things of God. It is during these times when i am most aware of where i stand in relation to Him. That He is God and i am not. This is a good thing. There are times when i feel inadequate to sing praise to my God, when i feel like i can/should not even lift my face, let alone my voice, to Him. It's not just that i am a finite contemplating the infinite... not even "just" that i am a sinner in relation to a Holy and just God... it is because He is God and i am not. The former things also play a part in that... but it's not just that sometimes... and yet such is the reason Christ came to the Earth in the form of a man so that He could relate to man and even... me. That i could have fellowship with Him... that i could be restored to the Father... that i could dare to approach the throne of Heaven to sing... and sing... and that brings joy to Him. I love my song for today. I love when i hear it playing on the radio and i am seriously considering buying the entire album.

This Fragile Breath by - Todd Agnew Album - Grace Like Rain I searched the world for a song that I could sing Praise to my King, A gift that I could bring But no music I found could compare to You Not one could do Justice to Your glory What are my songs compared to Yours CHORUS: You speak with thunder and lightening Your voice shakes the mountains The foundations of the earth All I can offer is this fragile breath With each one I'll praise You With each one I'll praise You more I searched the world for a poem I could read A rhyme that would bring Glory to my King But no writing I found was worthy of This God high above all other gods What are my words compared to Yours CHORUS

Wacky, Wild, incoherant rambling Wednesday

It has been over a week since my last blog and there are way too many things i want to blog about and not enough time on my hands to coherently type them all out... so crazy ramblings will ensue... My beloved is recovering "well" since her surgery last week. Anytime someone cuts another open and removes and moves so much "material" you are bound to have some pain. She is up and moving around pretty much on her own, but still has some pain when certain things occur. After her follow up visit at the doctor's office yesterday we have been told that things are good. The pain will subside over time. As of this update there are only 5 days, 6 hours, until the Carolina Panthers season officially opens! Summer camp has been a little bit of heartburn for me. The loss of Kemoeatu on the opening day of camp was a pretty big hit IMO to the defense. I think the Panthers can adjust, but only time will tell. Then the panic of the possibility of Steve Smith getting injured the other day was a little disconcerting. I am still very excited for the season to begin though. Looking over the schedule and i see that i will be able to see four games this year! @ Dallas on 9/20, hosting Washington on 10/11, hosting Miami on 11/19, and then hosting the Vikings on 12/20. That is the most i have been able to look forward to in many a year. Geaux Panthers! DS1 has pointed out to me that the next expansion for Fallout 3 is scheduled for store release next Tuesday. I checked my play time on the game... a whopping total of sixteen (16) hours! Granted, i've been able to play Blood Bowl a lot more often, but that's only because i am able to play a complete game in BB in less than an hour (usually). I've been having a lot of fun playing Fallout 3 though. My character has been generating some attention though. Some Talon Company Mercenaries have apparently been hired to wipe me out. I had several worship, and a couple of 'contemporary Christian' songs that really helped me over this past week. There is just something about music that moves a person that cannot adequately be explained in my opinion. Music has the ability to sway emotion. It can influence your mood and even your thought patterns. Maybe not every one would agree with me on this one... but it is a powerful force! I will listen to a rock-n-roll type of music when i am working something hi-tempo, when i am feeling meditative i find classical is good for me. While there was never any choice to not be home to be there for my beloved, i am still a little sad that missed the 2-110th deactivation ceremony this past Saturday. What a solemn time. I trained with men that i will never forget. I grew a lot through the Army National Guard and i miss the time i used to serve. But i am also grateful that i have served, and that i am now home one more weekend a month now. My place was at home with my beloved as she recovered, but that doesn't mean i missed being there with those guys either.

Music Monday - 20090803

Yesterday my beloved and i went and visited yet another church in our search for a new body of believers to fellowship and worship God with. This one was the church we were married in almost seventeen years ago. It's a long story of why we do not currently still go to that church, and it was not one we were considering rejoining only because it is a little further away than we wanted. Still, it is a church that a lot of our old friends still attend, and we are coming up on a period of time where we will not be able to attend services for a couple of weeks. It was nice to feel so welcome and connected. During worship time they sang the song i've chosen for this week's Music Monday offering...

If You Say Go by Diane Thiel, Vineyard Music If You say go, we will go If You say wait, we will wait If You say step out on the water And they say it can't be done We'll fix our eyes on You and we will come Your ways are higher than our ways And the plans that You have laid Are good and true If You call us to the fire You will not withdraw Your hand We'll gaze into the flames and look for You © Mercy/Vineyard Publishing, CCLI 3548640

While the song impressed upon me to get going on writing the letter to Sovereign Grace Ministries about asking them to consider a church plant in our area, my beloved was moved to tears during the song. When i asked her about it a little later she said, "I think we've found our church home". Now - i am NOT opposed to that, it's just not where i was at. My beloved and i have rarely been so "far" apart when it comes to impressions that we feel from God. It has been amazing... over almost seventeen years we have been very close and with just a little bit of prayer we have come to where we were in agreement on whatever it was. As a matter of fact, i can think of only one other time we were so "far" apart. But God has always been faithful and showed us where He was leading us and helped us see it together before we moved forward. So we are going to be entering a season of prayer and discussion as we go through the next couple fo weeks while my beloved recovers from her surgery this Wednesday.