Being thankful, Day #13

Day thirteen is a hard day to come up with something to be thankful for.  Not for any other reason than i would like it to be somewhat special.  The only thing that makes it special is that it's thirteen, a supposedly unlucky number.  Growing up my mother was a crazy superstitious woman.  I remember her telling me that she would have preferred i was born in Philadelphia (pretty sure, time fogs the memory) because they do not adjust for daylight savings time and i would have been born on the 12th instead of the 13th.  It was not a slight, or a disappointment, to me.  She had a thing for black cats, walking under ladders, picking up coins that were tails up (any coin), etc..  Once we walked on opposite sides of a pillar and she walked all the way back, halfway across a parking lot to go back around the same side of the pillar as i did - just because i refused to say "bread and butter".  I must have been no end a source of consternation for her. 

She, my mother, passed away in December of 2000.  She never got to see my daughter, she never knew about 9/11 (which i am pretty thankful for), she has not seen my two boys grow up.  She was far from perfect.  She drank and smoked herself to death.  It was only in the end that she saw what she had done to herself.  While my mother had custody of us, she was not usually home.  I grew comfortable eating cereal or a tub of whip cream, or grilled cheese, for dinner, because she was out at the local pub or who knows where.  I learned how to vacuum and wash dishes, do laundry (sort of), i scrubbed a toilet or two.  I grew comfortable being around strangers (ones i rarely had to interact with), i played a LOT of pinball (and got pretty good IMO, skills that have faded with disuse). As best i can remember i have lived in:  Washington, DC; Cherry Hill, NJ; Philadelphia, PA; Brooklyn, NY; Alexandria, VA, Arlington, VA; Annandale, VA; Columbia, MD; Athens, WV; Olney, MD; Rockville, MD; Silver Spring, MD - and these are just the cities i remember before i turned 16.

She fought a losing battle with depression for all the years that i knew her.  But for all her faults and failures, to the best of her ability, she tried to provide a better life for my brother and me.  I remember her putting us with a nanny and her family in Philadelphia Monday through Friday, i remember her putting my brother and i on a church bus on Sunday mornings (i once won a hostess cupcake ).  She did her best to date respectable men (which, with one notable exception, she was a pretty decent judge of character).  She once had us stay with some cousins in West Virginia because she knew they were a good family, and she was not able to support us.  She is a main reason that i am so fond of Christmas time too.  While there were rarely more than a handful of presents under the tree, she always put a lot of thought in to them, and she did her best to convey what the celebration was truly about - a time set aside to celebrate the coming of the Divine in to the world of man.

Today i share my thankfulness for my mother.  By many standards, she was not a good mother, and i am just being honest here, but i am still very thankful for her because she was the one whom God had placed me with.  It is a part of what makes me who i am today, and i know that she loved me, and i her - despite my own laundry list of short comings. I have a love of Christmas, pinball, American Football, an understanding of families who struggle with poverty, addictions, and depression.  I have disdain for beer and cigarettes - but a level of comfort in pubs (go figure), and a dislike of those who do not try but make excuses.  I struggle with tidiness around my own home, with self discipline, and understanding others.  All of these i can in some form trace back to my mother.  Good, bad, whatever, she is the foundation of who i am, and i am forever thankful for her.

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Being thankful, Day #8

Today i am going to express thankfulness for my brother.  Through all of my childhood he was the one constant.  While we tended to go our separate ways in regards to school and friends, he was always there.  In many ways i failed him as an older brother.  Looking back through my memories, i can only think of one time i ever stuck up for him.  I do not remember ever taking the time to spend with just him.  I don't remember ever being a mentor to him, or going out of my way for him.  This is not a good thing.  Still through it all, for some reason he has remained a good brother to me.

A few years back, my National Guard unit got activated with his.  Well, not entirely true, most of the guys in my unit were transferred to his, which was activated.  While i was not sent overseas with them, a lot of the guys in my unit served with my brother.  They were amazed at how different we were. and we really are very different.  Still, i am thankful that he is my brother.

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Being thankful, Day #7

Today i would like to express thankfulness for my sister.  I've spoken about her here in this blog before, and a lot of my perceptions were off base.  There is still a lot i do not know about her, but i do enjoy her company when our families get together.

She is 10 years younger than i am, having been born to my father and step mother.  She was born while my brother and i lived with them.  That is a cloudy time in my memory, mostly because there were a lot of court dates and she was, well, a baby. I do not have personal memories of what it was like for my step mom or dad, she under went open heart surgery at a very young age.   Over time i only saw her during my visits.  I have failed to take a lot of time to get to know her well, but she has always been a friend and encourager.  Now she has a family of her own, and although she lives like in another world, we still chat occasionally and get together for holidays.  While many may not see how i could be thankful for a sister i am not apparently in constant contact with, she has been a part and factor in my life since she came in to this world.  She has been a part that has helped shape me in to who i am, and for that i am very thankful to have her as my sister.

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Wednesday Wickedness - 20110119

Hi and welcome to Wednesday Wickedness! We are like other memes in that we will ask you ten questions each and every Wednesday. But our little "twist" is that each week we will pick a famous person and pick ten of their quotes. Each of our questions will be based on the quotes. Got it? Great! Let's begin this week's meme!

Well, for me... i am doing these a week late because i never have enough time to copy the meme, answer the questions, AND get it posted all in the same day... so... this is actually last weeks offering.

Today we picked Kurt Cobain. Here's Wednesday Wickedness!

1. "A friend is nothing but a known enemy."

Have you ever had a “friend” that you discovered was really an enemy?

I have a two for one type of deal.  When i joined the Army National Guard in 1986 i had a girl who i asked to wait for me until i got back.  I don't remember if she ever actually did promise or not.  When i returned from Basic training just before Christmas she acted like nothing had changed.  My brother left for Basic training almost a month to the day i got back.  While he was away i began overhearing phone conversations between her and him.  Since she only ever spoke to me a handful of times while i was away i quickly got suspicious.  When i asked about the calls she brushed it off, a friend blahblahblah.  When she went to go to his B.T. graduation i knew something was up.  When she got back, she announced that she had gotten engaged to my brother.  Wow.  Of all the childhood fights i got into with my brother, i was glad that he won this one in the end.  When they finally got divorced she took him for two houses and part of the 3rd, all of the bank accounts, and two of three cars.  In the end, my brother was left with a broken down truck and enough money to get out from under his bankruptcy.  My brother and i are talking again (it took a really long time), but i am not sure i will ever completely trust him again.

2. "Drugs are a waste of time. They destroy your memory and your self-respect and everything that goes along with with your self esteem."

What is the strongest drug (legal or otherwise) that you have taken?

Since this is something taken, and not administered... i had a Rx for Tylenol with Codeen once.  It was for after my appendix operation.  Did NOT like the weird feeling of it.  I think i took it once or twice and then just regular Tylenol.  I am not one to take serious pain meds for any longer than i absolutely have too.  I am a real light weight when it comes to alcohol as well.

3. "I had a really good childhood up until I was nine, then a classic case of divorce really affected me."

Has a divorce (yours or your parents) really impacted your life?

Well duh.  My own parents were divorced before i can really remember, but the custody battle lingered.  Until recently i had thought that other than having a difficult childhood, it didn't really impact me all that much.  But, i have been learning, somewhat painfully, that i am still dealing with shadows of these years.

4. "I really haven't had that exciting of a life. There are a lot of things I wish I would have done, instead of just sitting around and complaining about having a boring life. So I pretty much like to make it up. I'd rather tell a story about somebody else."

What's the most exciting thing that you've ever done?

For me the most exciting thing i have ever done was to get married.  Now that has been, is now, and will be on into the future, very exciting.  Never boring.

5. "I was looking for something a lot heavier, yet melodic at the same time. Something different from heavy metal, a different attitude."

Is there a heavy metal band that you are a fan of, or were a fan of at that time?

One Bo my mom was very found of, and strung along for many a year off and on again, bought me my first record album (back when they were put on vinyl disks).  It was KISS' Love Gun album.  Man, i really liked Ace Frehley's guitar solo on their Alive II set.  I pretty much stuck with them through High School but when they sort of broke up i went on my way.  Eventually i got into groups like Poison and Gun's and Roses.  Over time my interest in that style of music waned... mostly i grew concerned about the almost constant imagery of death, debauchery and the like.  And this was before i had become a Christian. I still 'crave' that style of music from time to time though.  Now a days i will pick up and listen to P.O.D. and other Christian metal bands... but my preferred style of music leans to a much more... sedate... tempo and volume nowadays.  8)

6. "I'd rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not."

Do people generally like you?

LOL - you would have to ask them.  A handful i know for sure do... but the rest... i am not so sure about.

7. "I'm too busy acting like I'm not Naive. I've seen it all, I was here first."

Are you naïve at all?

It depends on the topic.  But the older i get, the more i realize how little i truly know. My sons will not find this surprising however.

8. "I've always had a problem with the average macho man - they've always been a threat to me."

Does a certain type of person scare you?

I hate to admit this but i get nervous around inner-city youth.  I know it is born out of ignorance however.  While i have not had the best interactions with them (a school grading period spent in  Washington DC), i have survived to tell the tale, and not all kids are like those i interacted with.

9. "If you ever need anything please don't hesitate to ask someone else first."

Do you mind a friend who asks for favors?

No i do not mind.  However, most of them are like me.  Too prideful to ask for help when they need it.  Although, i had a friend once who needed to get his car fixed so that he could get to/from work.  When he asked me for help it was not to help getting his car fixed, he wanted to borrow money to buy out a paintball store's inventory that was going out of business.  I did not loan him the money... and... i do not see or hear from him all that often.  Maybe it was when i told him that i would loan him money to get his car fixed, but not for what he was asking it for.

10. "The worst crime is faking it."

Do you ever “fake it” for approval?

Oh, i am sure i do.  In most social situations i really do not know why certain things are expected, and i honestly feel that they are superficial and fake, but i try my best to simulate those expectations so that i am not thought of as "insensitive" or uncaring.  There are only a handful of people in my life that know me well enough to know that i do this... so, even when i don't quite get it right... they don't comment or ostracize me.

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Random Dozen - 20101020 - the late edition

Poor Linda over at 2nd Cup of Coffee has some real life interference while trying to get her weekly meme offering ready.  Fortunately Mocha with Linda stepped in to help out.  \o/ Yeah!  Although i am a little late in getting this published, here is my weekly addition to the Random Dozen.

1. Do you prefer to read the book or see the movie? ~ Mostly, i prefer the movie.  Not because i don't want to read, but because i am a slow reader and my life is in a phase right now where it is hard to sit still for more than 15 minutes and really be able to just enjoy the time reading.  Why?  Because when i do sit down, and get all engrossed in a book (which i almost always do), i have a very hard time putting it down and getting back to real life things... like MouseHunt. 

2. What is your favorite holiday and why? ~ Christmas by a wide margin.  Even at a young age, before i accepted Christ, i knew the holiday was more than a time to get gifts.  For me it is truly a magical time of year.  A sense of awe comes over me.  Now that i am a Christian to meditate all that this celebration portents is something i don't think i can come close to fully expound on.  I know that the date which we currently celebrate Christmas is a "borrowed" date from Pagan mythology, it is not the date or time of year that is important to me, but the Celebration of God become man, His condescension to come down to the Earth and live the life He did, and His ultimate end... to die for me, and all who come to Him, on the cross.

3. Which do you like better - the mountains or the beach? ~ That is really hard to choose.  I absolutely love living in sight of the Blueridge Mountains, but my Beloved and i love going to the beach - especially in the off season.  The smell in the air, and the sound of the waves... very nice.  Both have their detractors, and both have their enjoyments... i can't choose... but if i must... the mountains by the slimmest of margins.

4. If money were no consideration, what vehicle would you drive? ~ A DeLorian.  I have no idea why other than i like the look of it.  From what i understand it was never a top of the line sports car, and there were other issues with the car as a whole, but i wouldn't mind having this car in my garage.

5. What is your favorite cold-weather beverage? ~ I really enjoy hot chocolate.  Especially when it is made with milk instead of water.  I can leave those tiny marshmallows though.  Those things are annoying to me.

6. How do you communicate most often with your friends: phone, email, text, face-to-face, or Facebook? ~ It is sad to say, but facebook has been a revolution to me.  It has really enabled me to reach out to friends who have moved away, or even who's life are as busy as mine is.  If not for facebook, i am not sure how i would be able to keep up with my friends.

7. How do you receive your mail? Mailbox on the porch, at the end of the driveway, down the street, or post office box? ~ Our mailbox is at the end of the driveway.  Fortunately the drive is not all that long.

8. Of the four basic personality types - sanguine, phlegmatic, melancholic, and choleric - which is your strongest? Which is your least evident? ~ After review, and a confirmation request, i would say my strongest personality type is Melancholic, while the least evident is Sanguine.  Based off of the definitions listed below (as copied from Linda's page).  Although... the latter is not by a wide margin.

9. What do you miss the most about being 20? ~ Being able to roll out of bed and take an APFT and pass it. I also really enjoyed that time in the National Guard.  How does that saying go?  Being full of P__s and vinegar?  My nickname in the Guard back then was "High speed, low drag".

10. How long from the time you get up, does it take you to get ready to walk out the door in the morning? ~ I can do it in five minutes if i have to, with a little prior planning that is.  However, to do it properly, it will usually take me twenty minutes.

11. Who handles the car maintenance and pays the bills in your family? ~ I am "in charge" of making sure the cars are maintained.  Oil changed, inspection when needed, repairs, rotate tires, etc.  However, my Beloved tracks and handles the bulk of the bill paying.  To be honest, i was not always on top of things as i needed to be.

12. For those in the US, how many states have you visited? For those outside the US, how many provinces/other countries have you visited? ~ I have at least spent the night in twenty states, which actually surprised me (MA, CT, NY, PA, MD, VA, WV, NC, GA, FL, AL, MS, LA, AR, TX, OK, IL, OH, KY, and CA), and three countries outside of the U.S (Germany, Honduras, and Panama).  Even though i spent twenty two years in the Army National Guard, one thing i did get to do in uniform was travel (for training, not sight seeing).

Sanguine

The Sanguine temperament personality is fairly extroverted. People of a sanguine temperament tend to enjoy social gatherings, making new friends and tend to be quite loud. They are usually quite creative and often daydream. However, some alone time is crucial for those of this temperament. Sanguine can also mean very sensitive, compassionate and thoughtful. Sanguine personalities generally struggle with following tasks all the way through, are chronically late, and tend to be forgetful and sometimes a little sarcastic. Often, when pursuing a new hobby, interest is lost quickly when it ceases to be engaging or fun. They are very much people persons. They are talkative and not shy. For some people, these are the ones you want to be friends with and usually they become life long friends.

Choleric

A person who is choleric is a doer. They have a lot of ambition, energy, and passion, and try to instill it in others. They can dominate people of other temperaments, especially phlegmatic types. Many great charismatic military and political figures were cholerics. They like to be leaders and in charge of everything.

Melancholic

A person who is a thoughtful ponderer has a melancholic disposition. Often very considerate and get rather worried when they could not be on time for events, melancholics can be highly creative in activities such as poetry and art - and can become occupied with the tragedy and cruelty in the world. A melancholic is also often a perfectionist. They are often self-reliant and independent; one negative part of being a melancholic is sometimes they can get so involved in what they are doing they forget to think of others.

Phlegmatic

Phlegmatics tend to be self-content and kind. They can be very accepting and affectionate. They may be very receptive and shy and often prefer stability to uncertainty and change. They are very consistent, relaxed, rational, curious, and observant, making them good administrators and diplomats.

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The changing of seasons

I am pretty sure i've mentioned it before... but i am not a big fan of change.  And yet... the one thing that is consistent IS change. "Everything in the universe is on time, and everything is subject to change."

THUMPER heads to High School this year.  He is really a good young man.  I worry and dread and all that stuff, but for the most part he really does make decent decisions and has a direction and he is moving towards his goals - even though they don't include the military (so far)... i am blessed to have him as a son.  He's already talking about a job he would like to have next summer.  Of course that includes driving...

PIRATE will be starting band this year.  This one caught me by surprise.  He will be playing the saxophone for the first time.  This makes me nervous because he is not one to like practicing, and he has a low tolerance for mistakes... in himself or with others.  Like me, he does not do well with change, although he is getting better.

PUMPKIN has been practicing with a girls only traveling soccer team, and we even hosted two of the coaches who came from the United Kingdom to help teach the kids (it's a summer job type of thing for them).  She took is going to a new school.

After fourteen years seven months and a handful of days and hours, my Beloved is returning to the work force.  BY God's amazing providence, it is the same position that she left to become a SAHM just before THUMPER was born.  I could tell she had been getting antsy... well, for a while now.  A year and a half ago she worked part time in the evenings, but it was not really her 'cup of tea'.  We are pretty sure that this is a job that she will not have too much trouble with.  God willing, we will be able to get some money saved for the upcoming expenses like... cars and car insurance... college... weddings... maybe even a 20th anniversary trip of some kind.  The hardest part for me is that her hours will be flexible depending upon the need, etc. and also having to make sure all three munchkins are where they need to be and homework and chores are getting done.  I am most nervous about my expectations... i once heard a Pastor say "Disappoint comes when expectations exceed experience".  So true.

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Flashback Friday

This is a meme i have seen around. This one is from Linda over at 2nd Cup of Coffee (a blogging friend i have made). I've not really run with it before, but this one caught my attention and spoke to me some.Who knows, maybe it will become a regular...

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Did your family attend church when you were growing up? What are your earliest memories of church? Did you attend VBS (Vacation Bible School) when you were young? Sunday School? Other church activities? Was faith a Sunday-only thing or did it impact your life and the things you did? If faith and church were not a part of your growing-up years, when and how did you begin and what drew you to God?

My earliest memories of church were when my mom had to take us to a Nanny/Sitter during the week in Philadelphia, PA.We would walk to school by, and some times attend a weekday service of some kind with them.  My memories of that church are of the black/dark gray stonework exterior, and a not very well lit interior.  On weekends during this same time, my mom would put my brother and i on a bus that came through our neighborhood to take kids to Sunday School.  I don't remember much beyond that.

While i lived with my father in NYC (after my mother had almost killed herself, and during a two year(ish) custody battle, my only memories of anything church related was a Catholic Church on the corner of the block we lived on.  This one also had a stone exterior, but where the one in Philly was a course finish and dark, this one was smooth and white.  We never attended (that i remember) church services during this time, but i do remember 'terrorizing' the congregants as they exited mass, or from a wedding.  Zipping by on my bike, or playing cops and robbers with the neighborhood kids.

After my mom regained custody of my brother and i, i remember my mom doing things like getting us involved with the local Youth group at a nearby church at times.  That church was a more modern architectural design.  Lot's of windows and a gym come to mind.

Later, i remember actually going to a Korean Church service with my friend from school.  The services were all in Korean... i had no idea what they were saying.

The summer i spent with my cousins in West Virgina (THE absolute best summer of my entire childhood) brings memories of a more traditional Southern style building.  My oldest cousin (I called him "Uncle", and still do) was the Pastor at the Baptist church there.  A white building with steps from the outside leading up to the sanctuary.  Long additions for classrooms, etc.  In the sanctuary long wooden pews on a wood floor.  We sat in the front row every Sunday.  I remember the first one or two Sundays falling asleep right there in front of everybody.  This was also the first summer i remember attending VBS,  I made some good friends (but due to a character flaw of mine - never kept in touch), and some good memories.

My last memory of church as a child is of being taken by the mother of a guy who my mom was "attached" to.  One story building, wooden pews and wooden floors.  When communion came i got up and went forward.  I remember they used real wine (instead of grape juice) and it was unexpected.  Growing up with my mom, and a few other experiences, i was not real keen on such things.  So when i left that morning the preacher/pastor/minister/priest asked me what i thought of the service.  All i could think of to say was that i didn't like the taste of the wine.

God took His time leading me to Himself.  I truly believe that He used all of these experiences in my life.  Although i did not surrender my life to Him until i was in my twenties, He was slowly, persistently, calling to me.  Revealing Himself ever so slightly to a very fragile young man.  A boy who could not really make sense of the ever changing world around him, who was tossed on the waves of life, but every so often would crest a wave and catch a glimpse of Him standing upon the waves waiting patiently.

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Wednesday Wickedness - 20100721

Hi and welcome to Wednesday Wickedness. We are like other memes in that we will ask you ten questions each and every Wednesday. But our little "twist" is that each week we will pick a famous person and pick ten of their quotes. Each of our questions will be based on the quotes. Got it? Great! Let's begin this week's meme!

Today we picked Ellen Degeneres. Here's Wednesday Wickedness!

1. "I was coming home from kindergarten--well they told me it was kindergarten. I found out later I had been working in a factory for ten years. It's good for a kid to know how to make gloves." How old were you when you started working and what was your first job?

I was 14 or 15.  I started delivery newspapers with my dog, a Welsh Corgi.  Man i loved that job.  Early in the morning, no one around to bother you.  It didn't last though because i absolutely hated having to go around and collect the money.  I don't remember caring about the paychecks... not sure if that is really the case though.  I also remember recruiting my friends to help me out when we pulled all-nighters.

2. "My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is." Tell us about your grandparents.

I didn't really know my biological grand mothers very well.  My Maternal Grandmother passed away when i was 2ish.  My Paternal Grandmother was divorced from my Paternal Grandfather who was a Sailor in World War II. After the Navy he worked with Chemicals.  After he retired from Dupont, he became a Chef.  Pretty cool in my opinion.  My Maternal Grandfather enlisted in Army Air Corp during WW II.  He was an excellent musician (so i am told).  He outlived two wives that he has been married to for over 25 years each.  My Maternal GF was a "complicated" man, but God used him to witness to me in various ways.

3. "Procrastination isn't the problem, it's the solution. So procrastinate now, don't put it off." Do you procrastinate or are you on top of the situations?

I try and force myself to take care of whatever matters i can as soon as possible.  Why?  Because if i don't i then put it off, and put it off, and put it off... you get the idea.  I was once employed to send out a company's summer sales flier.  They had them printed, all i needed to do was put the addresses on them, sort them, and get the to the post office.  I waited until the morning they absolutely had to be in the mail by.  That about "killed" me.

4. "Sometimes you can't see yourself clearly until you see yourself through the eyes of others." What would others say about you?

LOL, Um... doesn't this defeat the purpose of the question?  I am pretty sure whatever i think is tainted by personal bias.  To be honest i am not inclined to care too much what other think about me.  Which is odd... because i really take it personally when someone disagrees with me... So, anyone who has read this blog and/or knows me in real life... please feel free to answer this question.

5. "The only thing that scares me more than space aliens is the idea that there aren't any space aliens. We can't be the best that creation has to offer. I pray we're not all there is. If so, we're in big trouble" Do you believe in life on other planets?

No, not really.  While i am open to be wrong about this one, i am not convinced of intelligent life on other planets.  My Beloved does not agree with me on this one.  Life as defined by science though... amoebas, molds, maybe.  

6. "I'm a godmother, that's a great thing to be, a godmother. She calls me god for short, that's cute, I taught her that." Do you have a godchild?

Not that i am aware of... but i know my Beloved is on a lot of emergency contact lists.  To be honest, i am not real familiar with the whole Godparent deal.

7. "I don't understand the sizes anymore. There's a size zero, which I didn't even know that they had. It must stand for: 'Ohhh my God, you're thin.'" When was the last time that you were called too thin?

It had to be Jr. High.  I did not weigh over 100 pounds until i was 13 or 14.  It didn't help that i joined Cross Country in High School either.

8. "I have the worst memory ever so no matter who comes up to me - they're just, like, 'I can't believe you don't remember me!" I'm like, 'Oh Dad I'm sorry!'" Who was the last person that you should have recognized but didn't?

Thursday night.  I was out with a couple of friends and ran into a couple from the 'old' church i used to go to here in town.  I know them, they are nice people, but my brain could just not lock on to what their names where. 

9. "I gotta work out. I keep saying it all the time. I keep saying I gotta start working out. It's been about two months since I've worked out. And I just don't have the time. Which uh..is odd. Because I have the time to go out to dinner. And uh..and watch tv. And get a bone density test. And uh.. try to figure out what my phone number spells in words." Do you work out? Have you ever joined a gym and quit almost immediately?

I am not currently working out, even though i really want and need to.  I have joined both a Tae Kwon Do gym, and a health center, but i didn't quit either immediately.  I enjoy it too much.  A local gym near me has a cardio room that runs movies 24x7... i would love that... i just need to make the rest of my life revolve around my workout schedule.  An important lesson i learned once... you will find time for the things that are important to you (and free time never schedules itself).

10. 'We use 10 percent of our brains. Imagine how much we could accomplish if we used the other 60 percent." Do you feel that you utilize all your intelligence in every situation?

No, not always.  I once asked my Drill Sergeant is opinion of me.  He told me that i tended to slack off when i thought no one was looking.  That would include both physical and mental tasks.

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Friday Ramblings

This morning i woke up with what i can only describe as "tingly brain".  Before the sleep study i would get them every once in a while, never knew why.  Now that i know... i am a little more concerned, but at least i know what causes it.  I just don't like the fuzzy headed after affect.  Another problem is that the more seizures you have, the more likely you are to have them again.  Sort of like getting dehydrated... which reminds me... i have a new goal.  I want to drink 100 oz. of water a day.  Sort of wean myself off of the pop.

I have moved to a new area in MouseHunt.  I have entered the Furoma Dojo, the area of 'Tactical' mice.  It has become my newest favorite place in MouseHunt.  One reason i like it is i have captured a "samurai mouse".  OK, a little biased... but hey.  I have to double check, but i think there are only two mice there i have yet to catch.  The Master of the Dojo,and the Dojo Sensei mouse.  Before i can move up to the Pinnacle chamber to try my skill (aka Luck) at catching them, i need to be able to craft the right kind of bait.  You see, just like their students below them, they are only attracted by a certain kind of cheese.  In order to make this cheese i need to be patient, and hunt the students for the ingredients to make the cheese that only the masters are attracted to, in order to collect the pieces i need to make the cheese to attract the Dojo Master... who in turn has the pieces i need to catch the Sensei.  But in order to craft the cheese for the 2nd to last mouse in this area... i have to gain more experience... which means hunting the student mice... which is fine, because i need a LOT more tokens to collect the shards... to collect the black onyx.... etc.  Did i mention that this game requires patience?

I have the next section of my story 'ready' to post on my short story blog, but i've actually postponed posting it.  Mostly because i've not been disciplining myself to sit down and continue writing the follow up chapters.  8(  I was on a roll for a while... i wonder what changed recently...

I have come up with blogging names for the whole family... people kept asking me what/who is "DS1", etc.So... My Beloved is of course my bride.  LONG-SHANKS is DS1,  PIRATE will be DS2, PUMPKIN is DD3, COWGIRL is the mother of the family who is staying with us for a little while, SLIM is her DS1, and DANCER is her DD2.  I do this with my other friends on here as well... RAM, MOUSE, PROFESSOR, PETRA, RAIDER, WYRD, TYNIE, ORC, DX3... well, you get the idea.  This way i have names for them, while not revealing personal information about them.

I am out of time to ramble for today.  God Bless you all, and for all the Fathers out there - Happy Father's Day!

The start of a new season

Since 2 days before DS1 (my oldest) was born i have been employed with the same company. That seems to be rare in today's corporate climate. Over fourteen years with the same company. I love the company i am now leaving. They have been incredible in helping me really get on my feet career-wise. Early on they sent me to all kinds of schools, they were there for all three of my children. For the last twelve of my years in the National Guard they supported me with covering the difference in my salary during my two week deals, as well as for my entire thirteen months of active duty. So, it was sad when i found out that they had lost the contract for the agency i currently work for. I had to make some hard decisions about if it would be worth starting the mega-commute again in order to stay with them, or should i stay where i am and seek to be employed with the new contract holder. In the end, for quality of family life reasons, i chose the latter.

Now... on to my regularly scheduled rambling...

I have been having a hard time getting fingers to keyboard of late.  I really have been itching to write some more, to expound on the characters i have, but life has been conspiring against me.  A coordinated attack that even all of the pawns don't realize the role they are playing.  I have decided that my oldest character will probably become more of solitary guy... sort of like a hired role player (Doc / inventor) with the Steel Spiders.  My intent with him has always been to visualize the day to day things in the Under Hive.  My second oldest has been about to experience a serious life style shift - for about 2 months now.  No shift can occur unless i actually write about it.  Then there are the two new kids on the block.  The 1st of the two needs some tweaking in his current story arc, and the 2nd actually needs to get an introduction.  The only female lead... well, i 've got nothing for her right now... she will have to sit idle at least until something new comes up in my mind.

Yesterday my blog actually got spammed with about 15 comments from someone writing in Chinese.  When i used the Google page translator (very handy IMO) it was for a lot of things that i would rather not advertise, so i went through and deleted all of them.  I have word verification for the comments, but... didn't seem to work.  I really don't want to have to personally verify each and every comment that gets added... but if it happens again i might just change my mind.

My mind has been so random of late that i have three unpublished blog entries filled with notes for future blogs, and i haven't even touched one of them for today (yet)! I have one for TRON, one of just one line entries, and one i've been working on regarding my thoughts on God's sovereignty and man's free will.  Ok, i will take two from my "one-liners" and call it a day for today...

The first is Steve Smith of the Carolina Panthers has declared that he doesn't want to be "The Man" anymore. (A good ESPN article regarding this)  Some may see this as a weakness in a professional sports player, but i see this as a man willing to set his personal pride aside to better serve the team.  He is recognizing that he is getting older, and while he has not "slipped" all that much, he is not recovering from the weekly aches and bruises as he used to, nor is he going to be able to maintain that top speed for many more years.  This serves as a notice to the Panthers that they can't keep doing the things they have in regards to the Wide Receiver position by not really having two complimentary receivers out there.  #89 has been the man, and i sincerely they do get a #1 to replace him.  I really want to see Steve Smith retire with a Panthers jersey on.  I feel he has earned that.

I will end today's blog with my favorite episode from Star Trek: The Next Generation.  Back when my beloved and i were "just" dating we would go to a weekly "hanging out" with "KEG's" family to watch Star Trek TNG.  She was hooked on the one where the Enterprise kept looping back through time and had Kelsey Grammer as the Captain of the ship that they keep "bumping" into.  But favorite is The Inner Light from season 5.  This is the episode where Captain Picard is affected by a drifting Space Probe and he finds himself living the life of a man on a dying planet.  I have tried to figure out what it is about this episode that appeals to me beyond the fact that Picard begins playing a tin-whistle-like instrument.  It has been a personal desire of mine to learn and play like that.  Just what i need... something more to take up my abundant free time... but just like a former employer used to say - free time will not schedule itself.