A few weeks back i did a "Trilogy" Music Monday post where i tried to find songs that spoke (to me) about our position before Christ's saving grace, during, and one post. Bear with me here... and while i liked the song i posted about how i feel we can celebrate what Christ has done on our behalf i felt that it fell short of what i ultimately wanted to convey.
In the words of John Piper: I am a Hedonist when it comes to my faith in Christ. Dictionary.com defines the word as follows:
he-don-ist [heed-n-ist] -noun : a person whose life is devoted to the pursuit of pleasure and self-gratification.
On the surface this does not sound like a very Biblical trait, but i would like to submit for your consideration the following. Where can the ultimate pleasure be found? Where there is no pain, no crying, no more death? (Hint, read Revelation 21). When the alternative is "weeping and gnashing of teeth" why wouldn't i pursue pleasure and self-gratification? Now, in regards to the former it is not i that accomplishes this, but Christ's substitutionary death on my behalf. I have but to receive it, and then spend a life pursuing Him. In many ways this goes back to my Charismatic roots in regards to my faith.
Don't get me wrong, i am fully aware of just how fickle my own emotions and desires can be. Just as in everything else i work constantly to try and make sure my pursuits and desires are "filtered" through the Word of God. But when my emotions are a reaction to something that is Holy, and of God, i have no desire to hold them back. I desire to cry and what i caused my Savior to go through, i rejoice at what He has accomplished, and when i am overcome with such joy i do want to dance and sing. Because ultimately Christ is my highest pleasure. I am most self-gratified in Him.
Well, yesterday the worship team at our "new" church played my song for this week and i said to my self "That's it!". 8) This song better expresses my reaction to what Christ has accomplished on my behalf.
I am Free Group: Desperation Band Written by John Egan Through You the blind will see Through You the mute will sing Through You the dead will rise Through You all hearts will praise Through You the darkness flees Through You my heart screams, I am free! I am free to run (I am free to run) I am free to dance (I am free to dance) I am free to live for you (I am free to live for you) I am free (I am free) Chorus: I am free I am free I am free to run (I am free to run) I am free to dance (I am free to dance) I am free to live for you (I am free to live for you I am free (I am free) Yes I am free
Yesterday my beloved and i attended a planning session for the 2010 Youth Ministry (at our new church) to see if we might be able to sit in and become a part of this ministry. (This is after i thought we were going to NOT get involved right away, but as usual my beloved has been instrumental in helping me do what i should be doing - being involved and serving.) While i felt like a fish out of water, it was also exciting. I am not sure how we are going to be incorporated, or if we are just going to be in the way. Especially in light of "old fogey-ness" i am detecting in my own mannerisms of late. 8( I am finding myself too critical in things - i don't like that about myself. Allowing my personal preference to shade the efforts of others. I need to focus more on the things of God, and marvel at how His grace works through me - despite me.