20060427

The Educating of my children

I have been struggling with a topic for today. Nothing would stick until I remembered an incident with my 8yr old son yesterday. Both he and his brother had pleaded to be dropped off early at school (!) so my beloved ensured they were there as asked. As background I will say here that he has been diagnosed with Asbergers - a 'high' functioning form of autism. Well, while waiting to be allowed back to his classroom he got into an altercation with another student. For him this will pretty much ruin the rest of the day. Then after he was in his class he somehow got into it with yet another student. As a result they called us to take him home. Now we've gone through the process of getting an individual education plan (IEP) in place for him. There are a lot of things about him and how his autism manifests itself, but that would be pretty intensive. But what I am trying to share today is my frustration with the school system. I am not one who shuffles my kids off to the schools system for them to educate and discipline. My wife and I take time to help with homework, etc. With my #2 though, we need help. We are needing the school system to help us teach him ways to cope with every day things most of us take for granted. Yet we continually run into teachers that just treat him as a behavioral issue - despite their own experts rating him as a "severe" case. Yesterday his assigned aide was out sick, and his regular teacher were out sick, thus they had no one there that knew how to deal with him - so they called us. On one level I understand this, but on another it angers me to some extent. How is my son ever going to learn how to interact when he is being set aside and treated this way (they have also moved his desk so that he no longer sits with the rest of the class). It will only further isolate him from his peers and eventually cause even more problems as his classmates start to treat him differently. I know what that is like because I was always an outsider in school. By God's grace I was able to deal with the situations - and I know God's grace is there for my son too - but it will be a catalyst for much more 'severe' interactions in the future. Oh well, if you are still reading thank you for listening to my venting, and BTW - shameless plug. Another short story has been posted on my other blog. Verse for today: Luke 7:1-10, esv After he had finished all his sayings in the hearing of the people, he entered Capernaum. Now a centurion had a servant who was sick and at the point of death, who was highly valued by him. When the centurion heard about Jesus, he sent to him elders of the Jews, asking him to come and heal his servant. And when they came to Jesus, they pleaded with him earnestly, saying, “He is worthy to have you do this for him, for he loves our nation, and he is the one who built us our synagogue.” And Jesus went with them. When he was not far from the house, the centurion sent friends, saying to him, “Lord, do not trouble yourself, for I am not worthy to have you come under my roof. Therefore I did not presume to come to you. But say the word, and let my servant be healed. For I too am a man set under authority, with soldiers under me: and I say to one, ‘Go,’ and he goes; and to another, ‘Come,’ and he comes; and to my servant, ‘Do this,’ and he does it.” When Jesus heard these things, he marveled at him, and turning to the crowd that followed him, said, “I tell you, not even in Israel have I found such faith.” And when those who had been sent returned to the house, they found the servant well.

5 comments:

rw said...

well, i havent been on in a while. hmm... im sorry about the way people treat your son. it angers me the way people deal (or dont) deal with situations. i guess you could say that im an outsider at my school, definately not popular. but i love it that way. i dont want to ruin my testimony to just be cool. well, i hope that the sitaution with your son gets better. the Lord will work something out though, i know that for a fact. well i hope you have a great day!!

ALP said...

My dear friend let me tell you I know what you are going through. My oldest has an IEP and even though that is in place I have more frustration dealing with the school system than anything else. I have considered doing homeschooling but DH is not on board for that and I have to respect it. Yet daily for me I struggle with what else I can do for my child when the system doesn't seem to want to help in ways that will actually help.

In his 5th grade year I had three weeks of school where he was there less than a full day because of what we deal with. He would break down, not be able to function and then they would call me instead of learning how to deal with it or helping him learn how to deal with it. I would love to help him but when you are not at school in the situation it makes it hard to do.

Oh this is just another one of my rants and frustrations.

God is there for our children just like He is there for us. We just have to trust that this struggle, this test they are going through will help them turn and look for Him.

ysiC,
Amy

Def Jeff said...

have you ever thought of a christian school? That's where me and rw go, grace christian skool.

ALP said...

def jeff I don't know how it is where you live but here in my state private schools cost a lot of money that I don't have and they do not have to honor IEP's either.

Some of them do I have heard but none I have looked into around me do.

s4G what about where you are?

samurai said...

Actually we were told the Christian school he was going to last year could not deal with him. We had to pull him out of there and place him in the public schools so that he could get help.

And that aside I am not able to provide the finances to pay for it any more. Single income - family of 5 - and 3 out of the last four pay raises I've received from my job has been 1%.

He does get a Christian education, but not in the sense of grade school. :D

Thank you all for your concern and prayers. :)