An wind swept wasteland

Yesterday I had about 3 different ideas of what to blog about today. This morning, nothing/nada/zilch - like by boys like to say "we got zero x3". :) So, I will just ramble on... For a little over a week I've felt the Lord prompting me to give my father-in-law a copy of The Cross Centered Life by C.J. Mahaney and the chicken heart that I am was to scared do it. My FIL has been staying with us on most weekends as he transitions from living in the mid-Atlantic to retiring in the state of Texas. To make a long story short he has had some 'issues' with the church in the past. I really do not know where he stands on Christ as a whole, but he is at least willing to go to church with us unlike my own father. I have always respected this man since the day I met him. He really has been an example to me as one who gets things done and takes care of his family. But for some reason (fear of man) I have been very hesitant to give him this little book. :( Well, yesterday my beloved had taken the children to church early and I stayed with my FIL until the 11:00 service. I brought the book with me, but then instead of handing it to him I left it in his car and told him about it. I suck. I really wanted to share this book with him, but in the end I just left it for him to find it. I later told him about it, but... I just pray that God would use the book somehow, but I am feeling like such a coward. This man has been like a father to me, and I can't even share a little book about the gospel. Son # 2 in age had a music recital at church yesterday (which is why my FIL went to church with us). He performed great! I dreaded the possibility of him making a mistake and then melting down, or even worse, another child making a mistake and him losing it. By God was gracious and he really has come a long way in regards to just paying attention to his own music. His teacher says that he is really good at music. She told us that within a short period of time he had memorized his piece and he does not even need to look at his music sheet. Maybe this will be the venue God will use in his life. My oldest played baseball this weekend despite having a slightly fractured little finger on his left (glove) hand. A week and a half ago he took a ball right on the end of the finger. When we finally got him to the doctor's office they told us that unless it was braced there was the possibility of the tendon pulling away completely (ouch). No restrictions with the brace, "just what he felt comfortable doing", so I helped him put the glove on and tossed the ball to him and then had him practice swinging the bat. He said that it did not bother him so the coach let him play. He's not God's gift to baseball or anything, but he likes getting out there and playing the game with other kids. There is a Fall league too, so I am going to ask him if he wants to play again. My youngest is just adorable. The whole weekend she wanted to watch the movie "Zathura" with me. Due to running around I only got to watch a little bit with her, but for some reason she just loves that movie. She has watched it umpteen times and chases the boys quoting the robot, "alien life form..." Hehehe. When I was out grilling hamburgers this weekend and playing some badmitton (read me picking up the birdie a lot) she told me that she was growing up. I said, "you sure are, and I wish you'd slow down." Why does the world have to speed along so? I have so many things to do, and I try and I try to just get down on the floor and be with them... but it speeds by way to quick. A picture of my boys married and gone, and my daughter in a wedding dress flashed into my mind this weekend. I squelched it as quick as possible. I just don't want to deal with that right now. God willing I still have another decade or two... My beloved has scheduled a kid-sitter tonight. We had so many things going on that to my shame and discredit, I had not done so myself in some time. You see I am leaving for an abreviated National Guard annual training session first thing tomorrow. She asked me what I wanted to do. I had "zero x3" of an idea. I told her that I just wanted to spend the time with her doing nothing. No shopping, no errands. I have complained that we are too busy but nothing changes. Pre-school ministry, small group, baseball, music, horses for hearts (for my middle son - autism), discipleship classes. It is not unusual for us to have something going on no less than 5 nights a week. A good week IMO is only 4 nights a week. Please no comments on this. I am working on it. Well, I will not be able to update my blog for a while. I hope those of you that enjoy reading my blog will return in late June. :) Until then may God keep you in the palm of His mighty right hand. Verse for today: Psalm 144, esv Blessed be the Lord, my rock, who trains my hands for war, and my fingers for battle; he is my steadfast love and my fortress, my stronghold and my deliverer, my shield and he in whom I take refuge, who subdues peoples [1] under me. O Lord, what is man that you regard him, or the son of man that you think of him? Man is like a breath; his days are like a passing shadow. Bow your heavens, O Lord, and come down! Touch the mountains so that they smoke! Flash forth the lightning and scatter them; send out your arrows and rout them! Stretch out your hand from on high; rescue me and deliver me from the many waters, from the hand of foreigners, whose mouths speak lies and whose right hand is a right hand of falsehood. I will sing a new song to you, O God; upon a ten-stringed harp I will play to you, who gives victory to kings, who rescues David his servant from the cruel sword. Rescue me and deliver me from the hand of foreigners, whose mouths speak lies and whose right hand is a right hand of falsehood. May our sons in their youth be like plants full grown, our daughters like corner pillars cut for the structure of a palace; may our granaries be full, providing all kinds of produce; may our sheep bring forth thousands and ten thousands in our fields; may our cattle be heavy with young, suffering no mishap or failure in bearing; [2] may there be no cry of distress in our streets! Blessed are the people to whom such blessings fall! Blessed are the people whose God is the Lord!