Am I the only one?

I guess I get frustrated over being accused of being closed minded. I know it is a pride issue on my part. I don't want to be thought less of for any reason. In my ten years or so of actively being on the web I have engaged in more than a couple of discussions about my faith. Time and time again my heart will get to racing, or I will find myself getting all wrapped around the axle about not being taken seriously or just dismissed out of hand. Why? I am not responsible for what others believe. I am not even responsible for convincing them of what I believe is true. Romans 1 is pretty clear that those that choose to follow the world will have a hardened mind and heart - and yet they still stand condemned because even creation screams out and reveals the hand of God. I guess it also stems from a fear of man. I want to be accepted by those with whom that bring up such objections. I want them to see me as smart and intelligent. One who performs due dilligence in research. And yet God has not gifted me with an ability to memorize and recite by rote most of what I have learned. Oh, I have done my research. I have read books on both sides of the aisle. I have listened to the debates. I have weighed the 'facts' as presented on both sides and I have come to the only conclusion I see as making any sense. That there is a God in Heaven. That Jesus Christ is the 'God Man' who before time conspired with the Father to come to the earth to bear witness and provide a perfect sacrifice. That He then died and also rose again to defeat death. And that Jesus then rose into the heavens and sits at the right hand of the Father to intercede for me. That through Him I am now assured of eternal life. And yet I cannot organize my own thoughts in debate. I am not able to pull off hand the information I have learned. So I am often discounted. I just pray that the Father would help me to not seek the approval of man, but to bear a faithful witness, and entrust the convincing to the Holy Spirit. Verse for today: Phillipians 2:1-11, esv So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, [1] who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, [2] being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 11 and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.