Nothing on my mind

My mind is a total blank on what to blog about today... so ramblings it is... Later this afternoon I will be going with my wife and son to his doctor's appointment for his autism. We continue to struggle with the school that he is going to. Yesterday my beloved met with my son's teacher and the school's supposed autistim specialist. Both told my wife and the state autism specialist that my son makes wilfull choices. That he is choosing to be bad. The state woman than said, "yes, that's exactly it. He does make those choices because it is how is can control 'his world' - BUT, he is not processing his thoughts like you or I do." That was such a blessing for my wife to hear. There were a few more things that went on, but that was the biggest releaf. I am going to the doctor's office to express my concerns. My son takes his meds, and it has helped, but at night while he is home is a pinball in contant motion. And I am not exagerating here. Unless I tell him to sit still (which only lasts for a few minutes) he is in perpetual motion. I have heard of one type of med that causes this, and has the potential of doing some harm long term. I am not sure this is the one or not... but I am concerned. I have to trust in God - that He is giving the doctor sufficient wisdom and insight. On another note... my church had their monthly 'biblical community' (BC) leadership meeting. Maybe this is indicative of most churches across America, but we cannot even get all of the BC leaders to attend these meetings, let alone a sizeable percentage of the church to attend a BC. We are of sufficent size that these small groups are the only decent way of ensuring that those whom God has brought into the congregation will ever really get ministered to. It's just not possible for the Pastor to meet with everyone whom goes into the hospital, every marriage that is struggling, ever person who is struggling with sin, or is 'just' experiencing a small crisis. Even the Biblical model shows deligation of the individual members to small group leaders (who in turn are appointed by, and responsible to, elders/sub-leaders). I have heard of a small movement for small home based churches. I am seeing the need for this in that I feel the church as a whole (and this is a total generalization here) is not taking care of the sheep within their flocks. I used to attend a church that had a membership in excess of 3500. They had from their inception (early '80's) supported and encouraged small groups. I am a supporter of the local church and those in turn being connected to a 'governing' body, but somewhere along the line of history we Christians have really conveluted the whole deal. Just like in politics I am not sure we will ever reconsolidate until the Lord unifies us when He returns. I believe that a local church can be of any size when it is properly led and cared for. From a score to over 10k people if that is how God is feeding his people in that congregation. but I am seeing that my role and responsibilities as a small group leader include maintaining contact and being a part of the people in my groups lives. This is an area that I have not been very faithful about. Let's see, what else. Oh yes... one thing that came to my mind last night. I am praying for insight and diligence in regards to something that may be an idol in my life. I am a huge fan of The Marriage Bed on-line ministry and community. Paul and Lori have been very instrumental in bringing what I feel to be a Biblical view point of what Christian sexuality is to be like. For those that are married, or are engaged to be married soon (IMO < 6 months), I believe it can be a place of healing; learning; growing, and uniting. I know for me it has been. But what I am concerned about, and it is strictly within my own life, is that the area of initmacy in my marriage can become an idol in my life. By this I mean - if it is consuming my thoughts, and my moods are based off of how close I have been with my wife - instead of my relationship with God, I am on dangerous ground IMO. Such closeness is a gift from God. But if I my relationship with my Savior is impacted by my relationship with my wife, then I am placing her before Him - and that is me essentially placing an idol before God. Now, by God's grace, this has not become a huge issue. God has been doing many wonderful things within my marriage (and TMB has been the predominant source). I have seen such a huge change between my beloved and myself - and our relationship with Christ - in just the last 14 months or so. I believe God is preparing us (my wife and I) for some sort of marriage ministry - but only time will tell. In the meantime I get to enjoy a tighter knitting of the three strands that make up my marriage - husband, wife, and Christ. Well, I have rambled on long enough. May the Lord's hand of grace and peace be upon each of you this beautiful day. :) Verse for today: Hebrews 10:19-31, esv Therefore, brothers, [3] since we have confidence to enter the holy places by the blood of Jesus, by the new and living way that he opened for us through the curtain, that is, through his flesh, and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, with our hearts sprinkled clean from an evil conscience and our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near. For if we go on sinning deliberately after receiving the knowledge of the truth, there no longer remains a sacrifice for sins, but a fearful expectation of judgment, and a fury of fire that will consume the adversaries. Anyone who has set aside the law of Moses dies without mercy on the evidence of two or three witnesses. How much worse punishment, do you think, will be deserved by the one who has spurned the Son of God, and has profaned the blood of the covenant by which he was sanctified, and has outraged the Spirit of grace? For we know him who said, “Vengeance is mine; I will repay.” And again, “The Lord will judge his people.” It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God.