What to do, what to do...

What do you do when you realize you really are just like those sitcom characters?  Okay, not a verbatim representation, but in a few ways at least.  You see, for years i took pride in that i was not like that.  Not that i could take it or leave it, but that while it was an enjoyable part of that relationship, but that is was not some be-all-need-all thing in my life.  Turns out the joke is on me.

Last week my Beloved and CHEF, who work together, had a passing conversation that went something like this:
CHEF:  So, have you taken care of him?
my Beloved:  (chuckles) yea, he's taken care of.
CHEF:  Yea, i could tell.
When my Beloved shared this with me it bothered me.  Not because she was sharing some intimate detail (which she wasn't, nor would she), not that she was sharing some personal revelation or secret (because i learned a long time ago that there is nothing sacred or taboo in our marriage), but because something that i felt i was "above" was actually so obvious to everyone that it is the basis for jokes.

A few things i (think i) have learned over the years:  1)  A good foot massage, or taking care of important things, is just as satisfying as the "connecting" to my Beloved.  2)  The scenes depicted in movies and on TV or hyped up.  Relationships are rarely that base and definitely a lot more complicated.  3)  You cannot dictate how others feel, think, react.  You can only do the best to lay groundwork to hopefully influence, but ultimately how they respond is totally out of your hands.  There is more... but my mind is failing me right now.

It is apparent to me that i have managed to make an idol out of something that is a gift from God, but i am really unsure of what to do about it.  I have, and am continuing to do so, going to God in prayer. 

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