Writer's block, and how to get known

Ok, before anyone accuses me of a bait and switch, the title reflects the contents of this blog, and while it is catchy, the two topics are not directly related.  It is my quirky randomness that drew the two subjects together and thus created the Title for this blog post.  Sorry if it misled anyone.

Writer's block.  Anyone who has ever had a deadline for an essay in High School knows what this is.  It sucks, even when you are not a writer by profession.  I know of a few strategies to get past it.  Go back and rewrite the last sentence/paragraph/page.  Just free write until something comes to you.  Start a new thread until you complete the assignment or something new comes to you.  The second one works best for me, but there are times when nothing seems to work except stepping away for a time and coming back later.  Sometimes months or even a year.  I got to a point in my on going story series that i just couldn't seem to move forward with it.  I backed up, i approached it from various angles... but i am stuck.  I've even considered re-writing some of it.  Such are the perils of not having a start to finish outline i believe.  I outlined some, but since it was an on-going deal i only went so far, and then out paced my outline with the writing.  So... i am going to take a(n as yet determined) brief break from that storyline.  Almost immediately i had another story line concept that i am interested in pursuing.  This one not in the Necromunda setting.  It is still in a gaming system though, because i lack sufficient creativity to create my own 'universe'.  This one will take place within Steve Jackson Games universe of Car Wars.  Yet another not mainstream game - even by table top war gaming standards.  I will see if i can get some short stories off the ground this way.  Mostly, because i just like to write, and i am just not a touchy-feely kind of writer.  I like to write about people that have to eek out an existence out of pretty hostile situations.  As usual the main protagonist(s) will not be some well off, silver spoon fed, aristocrat.  They will be an everyman type deal, and their trials and accomplishments.  I have one character outlined in my head, but i am awaiting some feedback from a friend on the second one.  We shall see. 

Sometime back, if you've actually been reading this blog long enough, you may remember my concern with the following verses:  

“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. On that day many will say to me, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?’ And then will I declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness." (Matthew 7:21-23, ESV)

It concerns me because it clearly shows people who were doing things in the name of Christ, and yet the Lord Himself say, "I never knew you"! How can one who proclaims themselves a Christian, a follower of Christ, not have at least some concern over this statement?!?  My concern does not come because i think the Lord is some kind of vindictive despot.  It is because i know He is a just God.

The Lord descended in the cloud and stood with him there, and proclaimed the name of the Lord. The Lord passed before him and proclaimed, “The Lord, the Lord, a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness, keeping steadfast love for thousands, forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin, but who will by no means clear the guilty, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children and the children's children, to the third and the fourth generation.” (Exodus 34: 5-7, ESV)

And the Lord being just is perfectly within His right to dismiss the very people that did all of those things in His name, and yet they are turned from the Throne because He never knew them.  This had me meditating.  I know we are NOT saved by works.  We can never do enough good things to overcome the debt we have incurred, and that we produce good works - not to obtain righteousness, or God's favor - but because of what He has already accomplished by Christ's work.  The concept of grace is not what concerned me... but the walk through life with the firm belief in those works are evidence of the grace, evidence of my heart change, but then when it comes to stand before the Judgment seat and hear those terrible words.  Then, yesterday the Lord showed me a verse within His word that gave me comfort:

Now concerning food offered to idols: we know that “all of us possess knowledge.” This “knowledge” puffs up, but love builds up. If anyone imagines that he knows something, he does not yet know as he ought to know. But if anyone loves God, he is known by God. (1 Corinthians 8:1-3, ESV)

I can see how this can be a round robin train of thought.  If you love God, you will do what He says, but we cannot do what He says without His provision, and because, of His grace, but how do we receive this grace unless we love Him?  In the end i find myself praying for His grace to love Him more, so that i may do the things He commands.  In the end it is but for me to love, to serve, to pursue Him, and all my effort and strength is provided by and through my Lord Jesus Christ.

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Musical Monday - 20110704

Another thing i miss because of my own not posting blogs of late... Music Monday.  This has been a song that recently has really grabbed my attention and brought forth meditations of God.  To think that God would condescend and become flesh.  To leave His glory, to leave heaven, to walk among man.  He then proclaimed the word of God, and when He had accomplished all that He had come to do, He ascended back to his home.  Because of this all those who come to receive Him and believe, will then get to share His home when our time here on earth is complete.  What an incredible thing to think upon.

Glorious Day

Casting Crowns

One day when Heaven was filled with His praises

One day when sin was as black as could be

Jesus came forth to be born of a virgin

Dwelt among men, my example is He

Word became flesh and the light shined among us

His glory revealed

Living, He loved me

Dying, He saved me

Buried, He carried my sins far away

Rising, He justified freely forever

One day He’s coming

Oh glorious day, oh glorious day

One day they led Him up Calvary’s mountain

One day they nailed Him to die on a tree

Suffering anguish, despised and rejected

Bearing our sins, my Redeemer is He

Hands that healed nations, stretched out on a tree

And took the nails for me

One day the grave could conceal Him no longer

One day the stone rolled away from the door

Then He arose, over death He had conquered

Now He’s ascended, my Lord evermore

Death could not hold Him, the grave could not keep Him

From rising again

One day the trumpet will sound for His coming

One day the skies with His glories will shine

Wonderful day, my Beloved One, bringing

My Savior, Jesus, is mine

Oh, glorious day

© 2009 My Refuge Music/Club Zoo Music (adm. by EMI CMG Publishing) (BMI) / Be Essential Songs (adm. by Sony/ATV Songs LLC) (BMI) / Word Music, LLC (ASCAP)

From the notes and the group and song writers:  The hymn "One Day" was a big hymn for me growing up. All I knew was hymns until probably 21 or 22 years old; that’s what we had in our church. The chorus: "Living He loved me, dying He saved me, buried He carried my sins far away," that has just been a part of me from the start. As a youth pastor, you want your students to hear the theology of the hymns and sometimes you have to play it a little different way.

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Something borrowed - and my own ramblings mixed in

I read this over at a friend's blog and thought it was pretty cool.

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The Mayonnaise Jar and Two Cups of Coffee

When things in your life seem
almost too much to handle,
when 24 Hours in a day is not enough,
remember the mayonnaise jar
and 2 cups of coffee.

A professor stood before his philosophy class
and had some items in front of him.

When the class began, wordlessly,
he picked up a very large
and empty mayonnaise jar
and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.

He then asked the students
if the jar was full.
They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and
poured them into the jar.
He shook the jar lightly.
The pebbles rolled into the open
areas between the golf balls.

He then asked the students again
if the jar was full..
They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand
and poured it into the jar.
Of course, the sand filled up everything else.
He asked once more if the jar was full.
The students responded with a unanimous
“Yes.”

The professor then produced
two cups of coffee from under the table
And poured the entire contents
into the jar, effectively
filling the empty space between the sand.

The students laughed.
“Now,” said the professor,
as the laughter subsided,
“I want you to recognize that this jar represents
your LIFE”
“The golf balls are the important things -
God, family, children, health,
friends, and favorite passions –
things that if everything else was lost
and only they remained,
your life would still be full.
The pebbles are the other things that matter
like your job, house, and car.
The sand is everything else –
the small stuff.
If you put the sand into the jar first,”
he continued,
“there is no room for
the pebbles or the golf balls.
The same goes for life.
If you spend all your time
and energy on the small stuff,
you will never have room for
the things that are
important to you.
So…

Pay attention to the things
that are critical to your happiness.
Play with your children.
Take time to get medical checkups.
Take your partner out to dinner.
Play another 18.
There will always be time
to clean the house
and fix the disposal.
Take care of the golf balls first –
the things that really matter.
Set your priorities.
The rest is just sand.”

One of the students raised her hand
and inquired what the coffee represented.
The professor smiled.
“I’m glad you asked”.
“It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may
seem, there’s always room for
a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.”

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I apologize for the infrequency of writing of late.  Life feels like it has been crazy since i started my anti-depressant meds.  Don't get me wrong, they are working wonders for me.  It's just that my writing endeavors have been focused elsewhere of late.  I write/read e-mails all day.  I write ticket notes.  I write problem summaries.  I even get a chance to write some more of my stories from time to time.  Then, when it comes time to blog... i feel like i am completely unsure of what to write about.  I have been doing the jot notes and save them deal... but i have not been coming back to flesh out the notes as often.  I am going to be trying to post at least one blog entry a week going forward.  Give myself a goal to shoot for.  8)  Anyway, for now... more rambling...

I had drifted away from collecting Pieces of Flair over on facebook, but i need to expand my MouseHunt flair some, and i created a few more pieces myself.  Besides, i really like using the images for spicing up my blog entries. ;-) So, time to spend some of my Flair credits.... 8)

Recently a really good morning radio show went off the air.  I really liked this trio, but alas the main guy took a job out in Northern California.  Fortunately one can catch things on the Internet.  LOL  It was the Mornings with Brant radio show.  I am especially going to miss their Monday Morning song, "I Saw the Light" as performed by The David Crowder Band:

It always brought a smile to my face.  I am not a fan of change, but i know that if there is one thing in certain in life, it's change.

Sometime ago, i had received an invitation - and please pardon me for not researching back through my blog to dig it up - to join a group that had strong disagreements with Sovereign Grace Ministries and its leaders.  With some trepidation i explored their site, and while i had a very hard time imagining the grievances i found there, i was also willing to admit that there are no perfect churches and it might be possible.  However, since i did not experience the situations first hand, nor did i know the people presenting them, i decided that i would not be joining them as SGM has richly blessed me, and as a result many others who i interact with - even on a daily basis.  So, with my continued support of SGM it grieved me to learn that C.J. Mahaney would be taking a leave of absence from his position as head of SGM.  This was due to several serious "charges" being made against him - you can read it more thoroughly on his blog: CJ's View from the Cheap Seats.  While i am disappointed, and grieved about these events (mostly due to my own pride) i am also encouraged by the steps being taken.  CJ is not without sin here, as is plain to read in his own words (as even more elaborately stated in his comments to his home church), and this has been occurring over a decade long period.  To read about his reconciliation with Larry Tomczak is especially heartening.  I do not know how it will all play out, but i do know that if more leaders would take the steps CJ has finally realized he needed to, the church of Christ would be a whole lot stronger today.

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I know i am but what are you?

It has been a really, really, REALLY long time since i last blogged.  Life has just sort of shifted gears and my free time is even more limited than usual... not sure how frequent i will be able to post in the near future, but i wanted to post something to say that i have not completely given up on this little endeavor.  If there are any return readers out there... thank you for your patience.

Ok, this is sort of an impromptu meme.  The problem is... i do not really have a whole lot of questions to ask... or maybe it would be more accurate to say, i am not sure how to form them into good questions... which i think is the true appeal of meme's but.... anyway... if you participate please place a comment here for myself and others to see what you have to say about yourself, and feel free to tag up to five of your friends.

So here is the catch.  You have to pick twelve (12) words that describe you.  You can do it in less if you get stuck, but no more.  Also, single words only, but then you have to take a few sentences to describe how/why it applies to you because what is red to one person is maroon to another.   Ok, here are mine.....

Christian - I am first and foremost a person who believes in, and follows Jesus Christ.  I am not always a good disciple, i am not always perfect... but in the end it is by His grace, by His life, by His death and His resurrection that i have placed my faith.  We all believe in something that is at the center of who we are, that guides our thoughts/emotions/actions, and for me it is Christ.

Samurai - I know, this one is probably a complete shock to you reader, but i hope that this is a word that does indeed describe me.  I have, from time to time, outlined my thoughts on the matter.  You will find them in the side bar to the right here.  The word samurai is derived from the Japanese verb saburau, meaning “to serve"

Sergeant - When anyone enlists in the military your first line supervisor is always an NCO - a Non Commissioned Officer.  In the Army that is the Sergeant.  Within the ranks officers come and go, they are usually not involved in the day to day interactions with the 'privates/airmen/seaman'.  The one to whom they look up to for direction, for support is their NCO's first.  My first enlistment was the shortest possible stint i could get, but i remember thinking how great it would be, to be a Sergeant.  Somehow, this High School drop out and kid who could not keep a job for more than three months at a time, managed to be promoted to Sergeant just before the end of his first enlistment.  That turned my life around and i re-enlisted for six more years.  I never expected it to last twenety two.  The word sergeant from Old French sergent,  from Latin serviēns,  literally: serving, from servīre  to serve.  Over time my Beloved will ask if i am going to lay down my jacket for someone to cross a street or if we have another name for the Christmas card list.  I am most at peace in my walk with Christ when i am serving someone, or something or group in the church.

Fundamental - In some social circles this is considered a bad thing.  I consider myself a "Fundamentalist" because i believe in the divinity of Jesus Christ - i believe that before the world was formed Christ was and He choose to lay that down and become man. I believe in the inerrancy of scripture - across all available sources of text there is a greater than 95% agreement, better than the works of Plato or even Shakespeare, and that while the translations are not always linear between the modern English translations, they all use the same "baseline" (if you will).  That is why it is important to understand (in my opinion) the translation philosophy of the Bible one reads.  I believe that Christ was born of a virgin - and her name was Mary. I believe that Christ's death on the cross was a propitiation, or payment in full, for my sins past, present, and future. I also believe that He then rose from the dead on the third day and thus defeating death. I believe in the miracles of Christ - I believe he fed the 5,000 and walked on water and healed the Centurion's servant and raised Lazarus from the dead. I believe that Christ will someday return to the earth the same way (but in reverse obviously) he ascended.

Pentecostal - I believe my life is transformed by the Holy Spirit. That i am not the same person i was before the day i accepted Christ into my heart and life, and although i continue to struggle with sin in my life, the Holy Spirit is here with me to help me continue to walk out my ongoing sanctification. I believe that the Bible is the definitive source of authority in my life concerning my faith.

Reformed - This word does not always bring about a good mental image either.  I feel this describes me because i see it as how we should walk out our faith is akin to the early church. We need to live out our "church experience" as a dedicated body of believers, committed to the local church - whether that is the group of believers that meet at the church building on corner, or few families that meet in a basement of a house. We need to live lives that are intertwined with other believers where we can speak into each others lives and help share one another's burdens. I also do not believe that traditions can ever form a basis for my belief, instead the "Word of God" (aka The Bible) is my ultimate source.

Charismatic - This was a popular group of Christians in the mid to late 80's, but they kind of lost their 'edge' as more and more people came into the 'fold' but never took it beyond the superficial.  I believe that my relationship with God can be experienced in my response to His Word. My emotions can be a valid part (but not THE only part, and they can be manipulated or deceived) of my experience in the worship of Christ. I also believe that the gifts of the Spirit are for today. I acknowledge my agreement with these statements with the following caveat: It must be tested by the Word of God. Finite man can't possibly be the final authority in regards to the relationship with the Infinite. Even though we know our experiences better than any other our flesh is corrupted and we can feign an outward appearance in order to deceive the world... and a lie told often enough will eventually be believed by the liar. The same can be said of the gifts of the Spirit. I think this "label" is the most often rejected by others because it is so easily abused and misused. But how can my emotions not be affected as God reveals His glories to me? How cannot i despair and fear when i see the depravity of my soul without Christ? As for the gifts of the Spirit how can one deny the healing of the sick, or "words of wisdom" spoken by an unknowing commenter that say just the right thing at the right time? But, do not allow these things to be the final authority in your life.

Hedonist - because i feel that the ultimate goal of my life is to glorify Christ. For me John Piper is my hero in this regard. As a human being it is only natural to desire to seek out what is best for me. To seek out things for my best interest. I want comfort, peace, security. I want prosperity and i want what is best for me! As a Christian gets to know Christ you slowly begin to realize that all of these things are ultimately found in Him! If we live our lives for Christ he provides us with everything that is indeed best for us! Therefore it can be said that by dying to ourselves we live in Christ. God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him. He is our joy, our peace, our security, our prosperity (if you will). The best thing for us, the thing that is in our best interest, is to be found in Him.

Eldar or Elf - For me, the romantic view of the Tolkien Elf is pretty cool. and maybe this is just a 'wishful misplaced longing', but the Elves of Tolkien's vision are good.  They seek to protect and to learn.  They engage themselves in the learning of things and the various dimensions and aspects of what they endeavor to learn. It is a similar sentiment heard in the movie 'The Last Samurai', (as spoken by Algren, the self appointed Western Historian), "They are an intriguing people. From the moment they wake they devote themselves to the perfection of whatever they pursue. I have never seem such discipline." There are so many things (music, writing, history, wood working to name a few) i long to pursue, but our life upon this Earth is way too short.  Sometimes, i think the pursuit of such things can also be a distraction - when they are pursued for selfish reasons, or for the knowledge of whatever in and of itself.  Ultimately i desire, and i truly hope this is a pure desire, to pursue them for the glory of God.  After all, i (all humans) were made in His image, to include desires of His pursuits (which ultimately is the proclamation of His glory and Holiness).  I do not know how we will be praising God through the ages in Heaven, but there is a small part of me that hopes it will be in similar endeavors.  I am sure that no matter what/how... i will be ok with it though.  I love that the original English meaning is a Hebrew first/last name meaning "God resides.  For me that kind of bundles it up nicely.

Nerd/Geek - an intelligent but single-minded person obsessed with a nonsocial hobby or pursuit - n. an earnest student; a hardworking student. (Usually objectionable.) - To be honest, i do tend to be single minded and my tastes do not follow the 'norm'.  Take the game Necromunda, or the music i like - Celtic Folk music.  I do not recall a single time that being "normal" ever really mattered to me.

Redleg - Ok, this is NOT in regards to a term to refer to 'poor white people' in the Caribbean. For me the definition is "Redleg", a US slang terms for artillery personnel. The "redleg" term in the U.S. military comes from the red stripe down the trouser seam of the dress uniforms of US Army artillery types.  The best years of my military career was as a "Redleg".

Panther - Ok, i was desperate to round out the 12th word... i saw a "Blog Thing" question deal.  Where you answer questions and they tell you what color you are, or what kind of girl you should marry or something that silly.  Well, this one was in regards to "Big Cats".  So i did it and it came back as "Panther" - LOL, "You are unemotional and downright stoic. It's hard to ruffle your feathers.  You have an amazing depth to you. You have layers upon layers that no one else has seen.  You are confident about your place in the world, and you've happily carved out your own niche.  You live primarily inside your own mind. You happily spend a lot of time thinking."

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Overdue Ramblings

Wow, i cannot remember the last time i blogged... and i am too lazy to go back and find out while typing this one up so... i am just going to go with it.  This one may be long in the tooth as i have several notes i dropped into an unpublished blog entry - which is not being converted into one i am going to (actually) publish.  So let us begin, shall we.

Some time back i mentioned that i was going to do a "Dragon Hunt" in my favorite Facebook game, MouseHunt.  Wow, it was a miserable failure!  LOL - i had 50 pieces of bait, i attracted the beast 14 times, and caught it exactly 0 (zero) times!  That's right, none, nil, nada, zilch, diddly squat!  LOL  God is an awesome God.  He has a perfect way to ensure i do not get so full of myself that i lose sight of more important things.  Even when i jest, whenever i boast or talk smack, i get my tucas handed to me.  In this case i was 'boasting' how i was going to do so well with a fellow MouseHunter that is much more experienced than i. This has been true since... well, High School.  RAM, who i play a lot of games with over the years.  We are pretty evenly matched strategically, etc.  When i just "mind the house" and just take care of business i do pretty well, but practically every time in my almost 30 years of knowing him that i boasted and/or talked smack... he thrashes me in the event.  LOL  Maybe it's a mental block on my end... but i honestly believe it is God's grace that allows it.  And this is a good thing.  If i think about it... i will expound on how my praying for patience is working out in my life.  8)

Well, since then i have dove into the Seasonal Garden and Zugzwang's Tower.  While i enjoy the seasonal theme, i get impatient.  Because i am not willing to just throw expensive Super Brie at attracting the mice (it costs real money, or 4,000+ gold per piece) i tend to get a lot of "failure to attract" (or FTA) results.  This causing the power meter to dribble down 3% each time, while most of the mice you do catch only raise the bar 1% or so.  So it takes me a long time to get the amplifier fully boosted to 150%.  But once that is completed i am able to hit the tower.  I like the overall chess theme and the strategy involved.  What trap to use and when.  What bait and/or base to use and when.  Time is not on your side here.  Each mouse you catch the power bar you worked so hard to charge up out in the garden, drops it a percentage based on the point value of the piece (for example, Pawns drop the meter 1% while Queens drop it 9%).  You also have to catch the pieces in ascending order.  That is, you have to catch 8 pawns before the knights become available, two knights before the Bishops, etc.  However, once you have caught the 8 pawns does not mean they scamper away and hide.  No!  So you can continue to catch mice that you no longer need, all the while trying to catch the ones you do... but your power meter continue to drop with each catch (FTA).  I have made four trips to the tower so far, while my first two trips were decent, catching the King while still having 70+%.  My last trip it was in the 50's before i finally caught the King, but one one trip i stubbornly stayed until the power meter was in the 20's.  The points are great, but not as much gold to be made.  Still, this is my favorite area so far.

A week or so ago i heard about how a current trend is for churches to have some kind of door prize or raffle to draw people in the doors around Easter time.  I can see the arguments about wanting to get people in the door that normally don't attend church, especially around Easter.  Overall i do not agree with the practice.  I feel that it sends the wrong message overall.  I am not saying that God does not use it, or that He won't or wouldn't use it - because God can use anything of course.  In the end, i pray that God does use it.  The most important thing is the sharing of the Gospel, and that it takes root.

I have finally caved.  I took DD3 to Pet Smart and bought her a new fish tank and some fish.  I am just not willing to cave and get a dog, or even a cat.  My beloved and DS1 are highly allergic to cats, and dogs need to be walked and cleaned up after.  No amount of promises that "i will clean up, i will feed" were going to sway me because i know who in the end would be doing such tasks.  I like fish, even with the containment of mess, etc. not taken into account.  There is something pretty peaceful and fun to just sit and stare at them.

While i was watching a show on cable the other day i saw a commercial for "Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles"... WHAT?!?  AWESOME!  LOL  I already own the series on DVD, however, i plan on watching it on the Sci-Fi channel just to encourage it in syndication.  8)  I feel Fox really did not do right by this series, and i am pretty sure that it will not make a comeback.  This show is just one of many that i liked that did not enjoy a long run.  Space: Above and Beyond and Max Headroom immediately came to mind.

So, 12-Apr was the 150th anniversary of the start of hostilities between the North and the South of the United States of America.  I believe it is called a "sesquicentennial"... boy that is a mouth full.  Lately DS2 has been showing an interest in seeing a reenactment.  It's not the soldiers he is most interested in, but the muskets for some reason.  He has been wanting me to take him to one for almost a year now, so... i am going to be more actively engaged in trying to find one close to home.  It really shouldn't be as hard as i am making it living this close to the Mason-Dixon line and all.  Oh, and if you can... i HIGHLY recommend Ken Burns' "The Civil War" special that first aired on PBS.  An excellent work in my opinion.

Ok, i am finally going to wrap this up.  One thing that has 'hindered' my blogging has been a tare i have been having writing my short stories.  All told i am pretty sure i've put down over 10k words.  All three of my story lines have moved some.  One has not been "published" (i.e. posted to my short stories blog site, not ink and paper), but the other two have moved along nicely.  i have even taken some decent notes on where to go with all three at this point, so in a way... even if it means my blogging "suffers" (and judging from the number of readers... it will not be missed too terribly) so i can get more writing done.

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One morning last week i got into a discussion with a friend of mine about how i feel that i need to learn to be more aggressive in some ways.  It was then inferred that i did not know what that meant, being the clueless git that i am.  I still don't know what they meant though, so i thought i'd look it up and try and figure it out.

ag·gres·sive
[uh-gres-iv] -adjective
1. characterized by or tending toward unprovoked offensives, attacks, invasions, or like; militantly forward or menacing: aggressive acts against a neighboring country.
2. making an all-out effort to win or succeed; competitive: an aggressive basketball player.
3. vigorously energetic, especially in the use of initiative and forcefulness: an aggressive salesperson.
4.boldly assertive and forward; pushy: an aggressive driver.
5.emphasizing maximum growth and capital gains over quality, security, and income: an aggressive mutual fund.
6.Medicine/Medical .
      a.(of a disease or tumor) spreading rapidly or highly invasive; difficult or impossible to treat successfully.
      b.pertaining to a risky surgery or treatment, or to a medication that has grave side effects: aggressive chemotherapy.

Origin:
ag·gress
[uh-gres] -verb
1.to commit the first act of hostility or offense; attack first.
2.to begin to quarrel.

To be honest... in the context i had intended... most of those definitions were not what i was going for.  I wanted to say that i wanted to be the initiator, the first to begin as opposed to my furtive attempts before.  Always waiting to make sure i was not offending in some way.  I am not looking to quarrel i am just trying to lead in some ways. I guess if i were to apply one of these definitions it would be from #3 above.  Although... after this little exercise... i am still not sure.  LOL 

Things at work have been a little 'stormy' of late.  Just busy and chaotic.  Last week i was approached about the possibility of some kind of trip out to the mid-west.  I was both excited and nervous.  Excited because, well, i don't do a lot of business trips.  Nervous because i would be going into someone else's "house" to sniff around.  It's a long story, and one i would not like to air out here in public.  For my take on things, i would not be going to exert any kind of pressure.  I would only be there to get a better idea of how things are working there, look under the hood so to speak, and see what we could do to interact together more efficiently.  Today it looks as if the long reconnaissance patrol has been canceled. Basically i am standing by to stand by.

For some time now PUMPKIN (DD3) has been wanting a puppy REALLY bad.  Before i say anything else, i love dogs.  I like the comradery , the unconditional acceptance, and the incredible faithfulness of the canine species in general.  But in the end, i am not ready to have a dog in our home.  Dogs require a lot of care.  I do not want to get a dog and then neglect it in some fashion.  Of course she says she would take care of it, etc., but i know the truth.  Next winter when it is snowing i am going to be the one out there walking the dog and cleaning up the yard.  Then, there are the medical bills, etc. that eventually arise.  Due to allergies etc. a cat is out of the question too.  Note: unlike some dog lovers i am not opposed to cats.  I like cats for their independence and how they can (generally) clean up behind themselves.  They can also get in trouble and create messes too, but again... i am leery of the additional expense of having a cat.  Animals deserve, and require, care and one should not assume the responsibility of ownership of a pet unless you are prepared to care adequately for them.  As a compromise i went out and bought a starter ten gallon fish tank. We have it set up in her room to allow the water to balance out and we will be going to get the fish later this week.  I had never heard that the ratio for fish is generally 1" of fish per gallon of water capacity of the tank.  I am still pretty sure i will be the one who ends up taking care of the thing, but at least the fish won't smell up the house or tear up the yard.

I deferred my Dragon hunt in MouseHunt due to a special event where the amount of scrap metal dropped by the various mice was doubled.  "Farming" for scrap metal in MouseHunt is a test of endurance and patience.  I recently constructed a powerful base, but it took 200 pieces of scrap to make it.  I am pretty sure the cumulative time it took me to gather it all up was literally a month or so. Now, i am not sure what else i might need it for, or if there is something coming up that will needed it, but one cannot ignore such events on just the off chance it will come in handy.  Anyway... i have begun my Dragon hunt in earnest as of Monday.  If i catch two Dragons will be happy... if one of the two should happen to drop the blueprints for a very powerful Hydro trap... i will be ecstatic. Once this brief run (50 pieces of cheese maximum) is completed, i am finally beginning my run through the Seasonal Gardens and Zugzwang's Tower.  I have so been looking forward to this region because i LOVE chess... even though i am not very good at it.  In preparation i have already purchased and crafted the traps i am able to use at this level.  If i can get the Heat Bath blueprints from the Dragons i will be even more prepared.  Unfortunately i had to smash my one Chess themed trap that i did have to craft the even more powerful one... but i will save up to replace it.  I am going to shamelessly post each chess piece i catch on my facebook profile.  I apologize to my friends in advance for, perhaps, unwanted game advertisements.

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Happy St. Patrick's Day!

While i am not Irish, nor where any of my ancestors (that i am currently aware of), i am married to a beautiful Irish redhead.  So, i am Irish by marriage.  8)  However, that does not mean i am fully aware of all of the traditions and such that surround this holiday.  Not too long ago i got chewed out for stating something about corn beef and cabbage being a traditional meal.  Whatever, all i know is that my wife and her family like to eat it on St. Patrick's Day.  I was going to wear orange today, because i had been told that Catholics wear green and Protestants wear orange in their show of support for the day, but when my beloved caught wind of it i was told in pretty definitive terms that i was to wear green and NOT orange.  LOL, so... i have green on... but i am orange on the inside.  8)  I am listening to my Celtic Folk Pandora station today.  Ok, i listen to it most days, but it counts today.

On that note:  I once sought out an Irish Pub when i was staying overnight during a Guard drill.  I called well in advance of my stay and asked if they were going to be having a live band playing on the night in question.  I was assured that they were.  So, that evening i went and got there early, selected a prime spot, outside of the direct sound-wave cone, and ordered my meal.  When the band took the stage, did they play foot tappin', fiddle and whistle, tunes!?!  Nope!  They were playing classic rock songs!  Wow... talk about disappointment.  The best experience i have ever had in an Irish Pub was at Kevin Barry's in Savannah, GA.  I cannot recommend this place highly enough.  Both times i visited were great.  Great food, great drink, great music.

Go raibh tú daibhir i mí-áidh
Agus saibhir i mbeannachtaí
Go mall ag déanamh namhaid, go luath a déanamh carad,
Ach saibhir nó daibhir, go mall nó go luath,
Nach raibh ach áthas agat
Ón lá seo amach.

May you be poor in misfortune,
Rich in blessings,
Slow to make enemies,
quick to make friends,
But rich or poor, quick or slow,
May you know nothing but happiness
From this day forward.

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