A funny thing happened on the way to church

Last night my beloved and i were supposed to enjoy an evening with friends coming over for dinner. Unfortunately one of our friends rolled her ankle (it looked like a small grapefruit), so we took the meal to their house. We ended up spending the evening discussing things of our church and our search for another church "home". One thing that kind of sunk in as i woke up this morning. The church is not a business. Too many times i am hearing things like "seeker services" or "but our numbers are up". Last night as i reviewed how things were being addressed regarding our current situation it just 'smells like' a business plan. I want to review some things and really look to see if the issue at the heart of it all was being addressed... sin. Too often 'difficulties' are dealt with in an indirect way. People turn to gossip and innuendo in the hopes that someone else will deal with the "problem". To my shame i know that to at least a small degree either i have, or my family has, been a part of this. Although there is now an effort to deal with the issue in an upfront manner, it has thus far been seen as nothing more than an inconvenience and/or a larger example of gossip run amok. I am not privy to the inner workings of the Deacons, or the Pastoral team so i am not really sure how things are being dealt with. There are concerns of mine that are not just personal preference, but i am not in a position to share them. Either learn how i am wrong, or being able to help another brother grow. Either way the body of Christ is edified and made stronger. Speaking of which, i have been downloading sermons from the church i had wanted before i moved to where i live now. It is a sister church to Covenant Life Church. Before i moved to where i live now i drove with my family 45 minutes from Frederick to Gaithersburg every Sunday, and twice a month for caregroup meetings. Covenant Life was the church i was saved into back in August of 1989 (back then they met in a High School auditorium). Eventually God placed it on my heart to write a note asking that the pastors of Covenant Life, and the team of Sovereign Grace Ministries, to consider a church plant in Frederick, MD. To make a long story short, and to also note that i was nothing more than perhaps a footnote, the church plant in Frederick took place after we moved away. *chuckle* Sovereign Grace Church of Frederick was born! Although my family and i were not able to attend there, i rejoiced in seeing the church being born for an area i had felt God give me a burden for (even if it was not a burden for me to be a part of). With all of the wandering my family and i have been doing in regards to our church home of late i began to download sermons from this relatively young church. Today as i was downloading this past Sunday's sermon (titled "The Atonement: Confidently Waiting for Glory") i decided to look up the directions to where they meet. I knew it was too far to go weekly, but perhaps some Sunday i could just visit... i found out they meet at the Tusorora High School... within sight distance of my old house! LOL God is awesome. Well to tie it together, lest people think i am a hopeless rambler, i have been considering picking up the quill once more to petition for yet another church plant. Obviously closer to where i currently live. I am struggling with the fear of man here. You might think the opposite is true, but i am concerned with how the letter will be received... what the readers will think of me (the two intended receipients thus far, both knew me once)... whether my request will be rejected or rebuffed. And yet this desire, perhaps a burden, has been felt by me since at least 1991. I know that sounds odd, but i have struggled and stumbled over my own pride and two feet. But by God's grace i have started an outline and will actually follow through with this...soon! Well, to wrap this up with a totally unrelated note... my new Tilley Hat arrived! Yippie! I hope to wear it very soon.

"No one is ever safe"

I have been rewatching season 1 of "Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles" this past week. (Again, I blogged on my bent towards this kind of genre... lol) I am glad that the series is more on a non-cable channel. This way I am able to enjoy the series without as much needless showing of "extra" "stuff". It was because of such things that I could never really get into "Battlestar Galactica" over on the Sci-Fi channel despite some seriously good plot lines, cinematography, and special affects. But such comparisons are not the purpose of my blog today. Last night, while my beloved was hosting a Tastefully Simple party I was able to catch the second episode. The one where they come to grips with being transported eight years into the future. An exchange between Cameron and John and Sarah Connor. Cameron states, "relax, you're safe", to which both the Connors reply, "No one is ever safe". This response actually got me to thinking about my life in general, and my walk with God. What is "safe"? Around the world there are millions of people who are not safe. They are lacking shelter, food, security. The lack community or friends to help them. But is our ultimate safety found in these things? No, not really. Our flesh craves these things because these are the things that comfort it. And trust me, when I get hungry I am not always the nicest person. ;-) Jesus shows us that our lot in life is not determined by our righteousness:

There were some present at that very time who told him about the Galileans whose blood Pilate had mingled with their sacrifices. And he answered them, “Do you think that these Galileans were worse sinners than all the other Galileans, because they suffered in this way? No, I tell you; but unless you repent, you will all likewise perish. Or those eighteen on whom the tower in Siloam fell and killed them: do you think that they were worse offenders than all the others who lived in Jerusalem? No, I tell you; but unless you repent, you will all likewise perish.” (Luke 13:1-5, ESV)

A book that was recommended by my Pastors when I attended Covenant Life Church was "The Discipline of Grace" by Jerry Bridges. This book speaks really well on that whole topic of grace and things that happen, or things that we do. In the end, are we really ever "safe"? No, not in this world. Our 'securities' can fall out from beneath us. Our bank accounts drained by identity thieves, our homes could be lost due to an unforeseen accident that leads to such an event. An accident can take friends or loved ones. Even our health can fail. But can we feel secure? Yes. I cannot remember exactly where I heard this quote but it goes something like this, "A samurai views his life already as forfeit. When he enters into battle he is already dead so there is no longer a fear of death. He can focus strictly on his duty." To me this is pretty profound, especially in light of my personal view of myself as a "Christian samurai". I am in service to my Lord, Jesus Christ. I need to keep in mind that I am already dead (to the world), but that I am now alive in Christ. My ultimate safety will never be found in this world, but in the next where I get to see my Savior face to face. Does that mean I go out to hasten that event? In light of eternity this life is pitifully short. Even when man lived four hundred plus years, that is only 4% of all the recorded history of man thus far. God knows the day when I will be seeing Him in person and it is not up to me to try and pick and choose such a rendezvous. Am I safe? Do I feel secure? Yes, but it is not found in the things of this world - in which I am never "safe". Verse for today: Romans 12 : 1-2, ESV I appeal to you therefore, brothers, [1] by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. [2] Do not be conformed to this world, [3] but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect. [4]

The Perfect Church

It is my opinion that there is one more myth that can join the ranks of things like the Holy Grail and the Fountain of Youth. That would be the Perfect Church. I don't believe it exists. At least, not this side of Heaven.
A little over ten years ago my beloved and I were going through a "church crisis". Our first child had been born and we were seeing things that were disconcerting. Not only a lack of fruit (Gal 5:22-24), but on a few occasions I found the Pastor taking verses out of context. Like he was trying to cram in scripture to back up whatever story, or point, he was trying to make. After meeting with a Pastor on the staff of the church we began to look for another church to call home. While on a mini-retreat to try and seek out where God would have us go I remember looking down into the Cumberland valley and trying to grasp how many churches there were down there. Then I remember feeling like God was telling me that He was at work in each and everyone of them. It did not matter if it was Catholic, Methodist, Baptist, or "non-denominational". It did not matter if it was large or small, 'alive' or 'dead'. I was worried about leading my family to a spiritually 'dead' church, or something much worse.

We ended up going back to the church I was saved in, Covenant Life Church in Gaithersburg, MD. For almost three years we commuted over 50 miles while I half heartedly looked for another local church for us to attend. Finally we moved to Frederick, MD. But even there we had a hard time being involved more than on Sunday's. Even for our bi-weekly care group we had to drive down. Although we never felt very well connected the church itself supported my beloved and I when I was deployed in 2002. Although our care group started out well, their support seemed to wain after only about a month. Shortly after I came off of active duty in '03 we moved to where we now live.

We found a church we loved, and one that had many more activities for our children and family, as well as one we could serve in (as we now lived less than five miles from the building). It has come to pass where I am now seeing some disconcerting things within this church that has brought me to where we are now praying about what to do. If we are to move churches again or not. I am mostly grateful that God has me and my family where we are not able to just up and leave. With our current obligations within the church we need to be patient, pray, and seek God. This will help us really be more responsive and attentive to what God would have us do.

I guess what has prompted this post is that I am at the very least a little discouraged. The first church I mentioned was torn apart (over a long period of time) by a Pastor who was very good a deceiving those around him. When his sins came to light it caused a huge rift, as well as leaving the church in a very bad spot (by God's grace it is well on its way to a good recovery - so much so we are considering going back).

The second church was a Sovereign Grace Ministries church. While I know there is no perfect church out there, I really liked the accountability that the Pastoral staff had. The integrity was palpable. That being said there are apparently people that have been hurt by this group of churches (SGM 'Survivors' is what they call themselves). While my family and I did not experience the things these people have seen/experienced, it is only fair to mention it here. Where my family felt the disconnect was in the lack of family activities for us to participate in, and an overall air (if you will) of "why would you want to go to any other church?". We also felt isolated because we lived so far from the church. While the Pastors we interacted with were concerned with our eventual move we never felt condemned for our decision. (SGM has since planted a church in Frederick, MD. The senior Pastor there was a man whom personally ministered to me and my family.) In many ways I am the Christian I am today because of this church.

I am not going to go into what is causing my current angst where we are going now. But I want to say that it is not a SGM church. I say this because my blog of 2-April inspired the invitation for me to check out the 'SGM Survivors forum. I know there is much that can be said about the Christian Church, but unity among the denominations is not really one of them. I do not have the answer to that dilemma, but I pray that God will show me and my family what we are to do.

If any of you should find the "Perfect Church" please let me know on the 'down low'. I promise not to attend. I'd hate to ruin such a thing, but I do look forward to attending The Perfect Church - once I am called home.
Verse for today:
Mark 3 : 23-27, ESV
And he called them to him and said to them in parables, “How can Satan cast out Satan? If a kingdom is divided against itself, that kingdom cannot stand. And if a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand. And if Satan has risen up against himself and is divided, he cannot stand, but is coming to an end. But no one can enter a strong man's house and plunder his goods, unless he first binds the strong man. Then indeed he may plunder his house.

Musical Monday

Easter influenced my song choice this week. :-) I remember hearing this song for the first time back when I used to go to Covenant Life Church. Sovereign Grace Ministries has inspired, recorded, and publish many a great song to worship our Lord and Savior by. Bob Kauflin also has a wonderful blog dedicated to worship in the local church (I encourage those who love to sing to check it out - Worship Matters). I know music is highly subjective, and there are a wide range of preferences when it comes to worship within the body of Christ, but I really feel (and believe) that these men have a heart for God rarely encountered.

This song speaks mostly about about Black Friday, and all that Christ accomplished on the cross. I also want to acknowledge that without His resurrection on Eastern morning it is unlikely we could feel the impact of that accomplishment as deeply almost twenty centuries later.

I Come by the Blood
Words and music by Steve and Vikki Cook
As recorded on Songs for the Cross Centered Life

You are the perfect and righteous God
Whose presence bears no sin
You bid me come to Your holy place
How can I enter in
When Your presence bears no sin?
Through Him, who poured out His life for me
The atoning Lamb of God
Through Him, and His work alone
I boldly come

I come by the blood, I come by the cross
Where Your mercy flows
From hands pierced for me
For I dare not stand on my righteousness
My every hope rests on what Christ has done
And I come by the blood

You are the high and exalted King
The One the angels fear
So far above me in every way
Lord, how can I draw near
To the One the angels fear?
Through Him who laid down His life for me
And ascended to Your side
Through Him, through Jesus alone
I boldly come

© 1994 Sovereign Grace Worship (ASCAP)/Word Music

Most of who I am as a Christian I owe to that group of churches known as Sovereign Grace Ministries. They are not perfect, nor do they claim perfection or some superior insight of God. But through their humility, and the personal examples of their leaders, I have been deeply impacted and affected. Scripture shows that leaders, especially leaders within the church (aka the Body of Christ) are held responsible for those in their charge (not responsibility for their salvation, but responsibility for how they led them). For my short stay within their "sphere" - I have been greatly changed, and I am still greatly affected, so in turn - those who stumble across these meager words are also affected. But ultimately it is not the leaders of Sovereign Grace Ministries who deserve the credit. It is our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ who all praise, and glory, and honor belong. Because without Him we are nothing, we could not call the Father our God. We would have no object of worship. So to Him be honor and glory, forever and ever. Amen.
Verse for today:
Revelation 5 : 11-14, ESV
Then I looked, and I heard around the throne and the living creatures and the elders the voice of many angels, numbering myriads of myriads and thousands of thousands, saying with a loud voice, “Worthy is the Lamb who was slain, to receive power and wealth and wisdom and might and honor and glory and blessing!” And I heard every creature in heaven and on earth and under the earth and in the sea, and all that is in them, saying, “To him who sits on the throne and to the Lamb be blessing and honor and glory and might forever and ever!” And the four living creatures said, “Amen!” and the elders fell down and worshiped.

Speaking of books

Recently a visitor to my blog drew my attention to the book "The Way of the Christian Samurai" (not really sure why ;-) ) and I really enjoyed it (thus my review of it yesterday). I really do feel as though it is an easy enough read that most Christians could gain something from it.



But once I finished it, it actually made me thirsty for more - reading that is. I have had "The Cross of Christ" by John Stott for what seems like forever, but I have never read it. I need to start that... but that was not enough. No. I have gone to the well known as Amazon.com and order yet three more books (which I am sure my beloved will laugh, and cry about).

I have ordered, "Living the Cross Centered Life" and "Humility: True Greatness", both by CJ Mahaney. The first one is a follow on to "The Cross Centered Life: Keeping the Gospel the Main Thing" and I am really looking forward to seeing what Mr Mahaney has followed up with. While I was looking at this book I saw the second book. Having been fed under Pastor Mahaney when he was the senior Pastor of Covenant Life Church I can honestly say that he, along with all those in leadership with him, lived out the principles of humility. Pride is a constant foe in my life and when I saw this title I immediately wanted to purchase, and then devour this book.

The last book I've ordered was "Seduce Me"by Darcy Cole. As a Christian husband I feel that it is my duty to make sure that my own "lawn" is well maintained and thus there will be no need to covet my neighbors lawn - if you know what I mean. There are some raised eyebrows - especially in my National Guard unit - when people learn that I am overtly interested in the pursuit of intimacy with my beloved. They chide me like I am doing something sinful, but then I am not ashamed to declare my love and "interest" in my wife. After all, marriage is ordained by God. He has used it to give an example of His relationship with his church, and there is an entire book in the Bible dedicated to such a relationship. But to be totally honest, I felt that I needed a fresh perspective on how I could pursue my beloved better.

Now, to get off my duff (so to speak), knuckle down, and actually read some books that make me think and can make a difference in my life.



Verse for today:
2 Timothy 2:14-19, ESV
Remind them of these things, and charge them before God [1] not to quarrel about words, which does no good, but only ruins the hearers. Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, [2] a worker who has no need to be ashamed, rightly handling the word of truth. But avoid irreverent babble, for it will lead people into more and more ungodliness, and their talk will spread like gangrene. Among them are Hymenaeus and Philetus, who have swerved from the truth, saying that the resurrection has already happened. They are upsetting the faith of some. But God's firm foundation stands, bearing this seal: “The Lord knows those who are his,” and, “Let everyone who names the name of the Lord depart from iniquity.”

Is it Thursday already?

I woke up very groggy this morning. I had a hard time remembering what day it was until I was in the shower. I could have sworn it was only Wednesday. Today is another practice day for DS1, and usually this would be a "light" day for me to work out. But tonight my beloved is teaching some social skills at out local Autism support group and she is nervous. So, I will be dropping DS1 off at the practice field (leaving my cell phone number with the coach) and then heading back north to be near her and DS2. Maybe I can get out for a jog when we are all done. Tomorrow we are taking the family on a church retreat. It should be a pretty nice and relaxing weekend. Nothing much to do, even Awana's will not be happening Sunday night. The only thing we will have is a soccer game at 5:30 Sunday. Although I keep most of my thoughts regarding the Panthers on my new Panther's blog I thought I'd comment here today as well. The team really is playing fairly well. Last week against the Texans was pretty bad, and there was plenty of blame to go around, I am still pretty hopeful for an above .500 season. A lot of people might be looking past the Falcons right now, but I am praying that the Panthers aren't. On any given Sunday any team in the NFL can beat any other team. The next three weeks are against division rivals (@ Atlanta, Tampa Bay, @ New Orleans). Each of these teams look to be ornery. Besides, there is still plenty of football left to play. Verse for today: Proverb 20:9-11, ESV Who can say, “I have made my heart pure; I am clean from my sin”? Unequal [2] weights and unequal measures are both alike an abomination to the Lord. Even a child makes himself known by his acts, by whether his conduct is pure and upright. [3]

Ugh! Is the sun up yet?

One thing about working in the IT field... the main hours to do routine maintenance is o-dark-thirty. It was a 'simple' LAN migration, but in order to have the least amount of impact on the critical systems (the ones the most users use during the business day) we started our day at 0400 this morning. It's hard to readjust the body. LOL And the mind seems to work on a 3 second delay... A long time friend will be starting a care/small/bible-study group up this September. Unfortunately (for him) he commutes 90 minutes each way to work. I felt led to offer him support in the teaching department (so to speak), which he gratefully accepted. now I am "on the hook" so to speak. :) We will be taking turns leading the discussion/teaching - four weeks on, four weeks off. My first "rotation" will be in October. But I am not sure of what to teach yet. My first thought was about "The Pursuit and Practice of Biblical Fellowship". It would be based off of a sermon by Kenneth Maresco I recently downloaded and listened to from Covenant Life Church. Some really good stuff about how we can come alongside one another to help lift each other up, challenge each other, and encourage each other. Unless your church is the size of a few families it is difficult for the Pastor to minister to each member of the congregation. And it becomes even more difficult as the church gets larger. This is where small groups become more beneficial. When I started this entry this morning I had some really good points that I wanted to share that Kenneth brings up in his sermon... but my mind is really 'mushy' right now. The overall general point is that it that the small group really can help each of us as individuals grow. It helps me see things that I am otherwise blinded too, and it allows me the opportunity to help my fellow brothers and sisters out. All done in grace. Well, I am going to wrap this up for today... God bless... Verse for today: Proverbs 27:17-21, ESV Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another. [4] Whoever tends a fig tree will eat its fruit, and he who guards his master will be honored. As in water face reflects face, so the heart of man reflects the man. Sheol and Abaddon are never satisfied, and never satisfied are the eyes of man. The crucible is for silver, and the furnace is for gold, and a man is tested by his praise.