Being thankful, Day #28

I once was asked, "when you hear the word 'Church Steeple', what do you see in your mind"?  I thought this an odd question, i see a church steeple.  Doesn't everyone?  Apparently not.  This was, and to a large part still is, perplexing to me.  I cannot think of concepts, or ideas, in words.  My communication comes to a complete stop.  In many ways this has been extremely helpful to me in my line of work.  

I work in IT, but not 'on computers'.  I work on the part of the IT industry that helps a computer in Springfield, anywhere USA, to servers or webpages, anywhere else that is not in the next room.  As i try and prepare myself to pass some industry certifications and recall the information later when working on various tasks - if i were to try and regurgitate the info i read on a page, i would get hopelessly lost.  But, when i get the chance, i can usually pull the processes up in my mind, like a movie image.  I see the packets enter an interface, get handled by the card buffers, get moved to the system backplane, get dealt with by the system's internal systems, moved on to the exiting interface and dealt with the outgoing queues and buffers, etc. and on through the path from receipt to delivery.  I even have the ideas of the upper protocols and how they are encapsulated within the packets the systems are handling.  This presents problems for me in studying and taking tests.  Why?  Because a large part of the information is contained in book form.  Any time i read large quantities of information, it only takes a few minutes until the words on the page and the ideas in my brain are blurring and the concepts.  This happens when taking the test as well.  I will read the information for the question, and then get flustered as i read the potential answers.  I actually do better (i think) with essay like questions.

Today, i am thankful for how i am 'hardwired'.  It is very much a part of who i am, quirks and all.

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Being Thankful, Day #5

Today i will share about my thankfulness for the career i have.  Men often evaluate their own worth through achievement.  A, "look at what I have accomplished" type of mentality.  When i was growing up, i never dreamed of having a family or a job that even remotely resembles what i do now.  I will not elaborate here, but my youth was, for the most part, not the most supportive, the most nurturing.  When i dropped out of High School half way through my senior year (i wouldn't have graduated anyway), my mother never asked my why i was home or anything.  I took a job with a friend in a warehouse for a company that sold pool and patio furniture during the summer, and Christmas decorations, etc. in the off season.

I was once asked by a fellow Guardsman how i got in to the IT industry.  He wanted to duplicate my path to get to his dream job.  I simply told him, you can't get here the way i did.  Not without God.  He didn't like that answer, but it was the truth.  I was delivering pizzas when a friend of my Beloved called and said her employer was looking for someone.  I went in and didn't get the job at first.  I was the second choice. Three days after being informed i did not get the job, i was called back and asked when i could start as someone else had quit over the weekend.  That company then sent me to training for wide area network (WAN) protocols.  When my beloved became pregnant with DS1 (see 2-Nov) i stepped up my education efforts and borrowed money from the in-laws to attend Novell courses.  I never passed the CNE, but submitted a resume to a telephone company, and was hired because i happened to know their ticketing system and a little bit about Novell.  This company then spent money to train my up in the ways of Cisco.  Along the way i asked a lot of questions, etc. but i struggled to pass Cisco certification exams.  After i was called up to active duty with my National Guard unit i ended up looking for another position.  In order to be home in the evenings i had to take a 2 Paygrade and 20% (cumulative) pay reduction.  Nine years later, i am still a contractor with the same agency i took that paygrade reduction for.  I am actually in my dream job, despite feeling completely inadequate for. 

In today's climate, and for much of it since my High School days, typically a H.S. dropout, without a College degree, or any industry certifications, does not sit in the chair i am sitting in today.  Now, i am not saying all this to boast about what i have done, because i am here despite myself.  I am thankful for this job, because i am able to provide for my family, and i am doing what i really enjoy and am challenged by.  I am even beginning (again) to pursue those industry certs... why, because i can grow and learn from them. 

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It's just like shooting phish in a barrel

I am not one to usually fall for phishing attempts.  I am leery of any unsolicited free opportunities, don't even bother with some kind of assistance with a money transfer, and i am not interested in any sort of time share.  So, when an e-mail came into my business e-mail address advising me that i needed to upgrade a certain function within my PC i should have noticed that certain fields did not look quite right, but this thing i was told to update is something that i've had trouble with before and before i verified anything i was clicking and typing away.  *sigh* Fortunately i realized my error quickly and immediately revoked the privileges of this function and reacquired new privileges using brand spanking new passwords.  I felt like such an id10t.  There were at least two things i should have noticed off the bat, but my guard was down and i was not paying close enough attention.  My paragraph here is to encourage anyone who reads this to verify, verify, verify, and if you feel that you have clicked on a link or provided a password to a 3rd party you would rather not have... change all related passwords immediately.  It is highly recommended that a password be a MINIMUM of 8 characters (12 is preferred), containing upper AND lower case 'alpha' characters and at least 1 numeric and 1 'special (~!`@#$%^&*-.,<>) character.  Also - it is best to not use any personal references in case "social engineering" is taking place.

I got on a writing tear.  6700 words.  I followed a friend's advice and just wrote and wrote and wrote.  I kept going until i got to the end of the outline i had worked up a few months back.  Although, i did have to wing it in some spots because i did not have every detail outlined.  I have now hit a roadblock of sorts... my own outlining.  I need to get going on that part, but in the meantime i am not confident in sharing what i have so far because i want to proof it at least with one go over.  Oh, and i have recently learned of pages being enabled on Blogger.com, so i want to look into that to help sort my stories, and preferably in a more chronological order - as opposed from newest to oldest.  I just need to take time to figure it out and how to get it to work properly.

I have often received good reviews in regards to performances at my work.  I am not boasting because i feel that it is of God's grace and favor and not because i am some awesome worker in and of myself.  To be honest, i feel inadequate pretty much every day.  I work among some incredibly bright people, and while i am able to learn and use what they share, i am often reminded that although i am a peer in employment i am not a main contributor to the knowledge pool.  Well, this year i was reminded that i will be expected to pursue regaining at least a CCNA.  *sigh*  I really struggle at book learning.  I struggle in individual pursuit of further education.  Get me in a class with an instructor where i can interact and put my hands to work on what i am learning, i get it.  Unfortunately, that form of tutoring is pretty steeply expensive and my employer is not inclined to pay, not unless i am pursuing some form of college degree.  As of right now i do not have a plan... and i am pretty nervous about achieving this goal put before me.

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Wednesday Wickedness - 20110105

Hi and welcome to Wednesday Wickedness! We are like other memes in that we will ask you ten questions each and every Wednesday. But our little "twist" is that each week we will pick a famous person and pick ten of their quotes. Each of our questions will be based on the quotes. Got it? Great! Let's begin this week's meme!

I am thinking about picking this back up again, but instead of trying to get this weeks famous person's quotes out there on time... i have decided to be one week late.  This way i can take my time and be more consistent with my participation.  Not sure how Janera Jepson will think of this... but it is the only way i will be able to keep up. I hope she doesn't mind.

Today we picked Mark Twain. Here's Wednesday Wickedness!

1. A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.

Do you let yourself off the hook easily?

No, not really.  I tend to be very "hard" on myself.  It's not because i think of myself as better than anyone else, it's because i am the only one/thing i can really control.  And even that i struggle against my own sin nature (see Romans 7).  I have observed that people will often shoot for the lowest common denominator in almost any endeavor - including myself, therefore i attempt to set the bar as high as possible in order that i may achieve the best possible standards.  I am not always good at estimating just how high that bar needs to be however.

2. A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.

Do you think everyone lies?

Yes i do.  Not all the time, but take into consideration that if any detail is omitted, or changed in the slightest bit,in order to manipulate the perception of the listener, even in the slightest way, it is a lie.  Now, not everyone does it maliciously, but i do believe everyone lies.

3. A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way.

What was the last thing that you had to learn the hard way?

Wow... to be honest i am not 100% certain.  Unfortunately most of my life's lessons are learned this way. Um, i believe the most recent one, and this was not the first time for me either unfortunately, that before one changes an IP address it is best to connect to the device by another interface first.  So, maybe i haven't learned my lesson... so maybe that shouldn't be my answer then.

4. A person who won't read has no advantage over one who can't read.

What types of things do you read?

Hmm... i read News articles (and no, not just about the Carolina Panthers), theological books (i.e. The Cross Centered Life, Reformed Theology, etc.), Science Fiction Books (i.e. Path of the Warrior, Guant's Ghosts, etc.), and various .pdf files regarding whatever router issue i might be working on - usually Cisco.

5. A person with a new idea is a crank until the idea succeeds.

Have you ever thought about something that did not exist and later it was invented?

I am pretty sure i cannot take credit, or even insinuate, that i ever had such an original idea/thought/concept, etc.  I can see his point though.  LOL  Recently i have been reading a lot of articles about how innovative the original TRON movie was.  How it showed so many things that the non-personal computer world had yet to realize, let alone understand.  I think similar things were said about the original Star Trek back in the 60's.  "It was ahead of its time" i believe the saying goes.

6. Action speaks louder than words but not nearly as often.

How well do you think that you observe people?

I am not a very good student of people.  I often miss the subtle clues, but i will take people at their word, and if they do not follow up - or what they have said is proved false,  i am hesitant to take them at the word again in the future.

7. Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand.

Have you ever used humor to diffuse a difficult situation?

I have, but i am not nearly as proficient as my oldest son, LONG-SHANKS.  He has a gift for being able to diffuse tense situations.  Often, a witty comment, or distracting remark can really help ease tensions.  But even so, it needs to be used with care... because often times, it can go the other way too.

8. Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

How important is your age to you? Do you ever lie about it or refuse to reveal it?

I am not really mindful of my age.  I cannot do anything about it.  I cannot stop time.  It is what it is.  Every once in a while my beloved makes a comment, "only six more years until you are ___".  I usually have to think about it for a little bit.  In some regards it does matter though.  I do know that there are things that i used to be able to do as a lad... that i really shouldn't even begin to consider now. 

9. All you need is ignorance and confidence and the success is sure.

How important do you think confidence is? Are you confident?

Confidence is vital.  Too often a lack of confidence will kill a project before it even gets through the planning phase.  One thing is for sure... nothing can succeed unless it is attempted.  Now, having said all that... confidence is a major weakness of mine... i tend to lack it... a lot.

10. Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.

Do you do everything you should to be healthy?

No, not really (he says as he pops another M&M and takes a sip of Dr Pepper).  I do try and avoid some things that are not good for me.  I try and limit the amount of pasta i eat.  I do try and avoid eating sweets all the time... and i try and limit myself to no more than one Dr Pepper a day.  Not perfect, but hey... that's me.

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Totally random thoughts

The past week has been pretty crazy and i've not blogged very often. I've had things i thought would be interesting to post about, but i just never got around to getting them down. Recently Facebook has 'exploded' with Notes being passed around... 25 random thoughts, 40 questions, etc. I like doing those lists from time to time (eventually i run out of things to say), but what i like more are reading them about my friends there. Unfortunately, along that vein i am doing such a thing here - but without tagging anyone. I merged a couple of them i did on Facebook, but also added a couple until i ran out of time/ideas. I am taking a long weekend, and tomorrow will be my beloved's and my Valentine's day, so i hope you all have a great, and blessed weekend. Oh, and these are in no particular order... 1. I would love if my wife would join Facebook - i need to share that insanity with her ;-) 2. I have trouble studying by just reading (either on-line, or hard copy)... i really need to interface with instructors to grab it... but when i do i tend to retain it 3. I have been recently diagnosed with adult ADD, but i am still reluctant to admit it - and my beloved believes that i also have Aspergers, i've just been able to adapt very well 4. I recently let my only Cisco certification laps (see #2 above)... 5. I want to work my way up to earn both a CCNP and/or CCDP 6. I have a deep appreciation for both architecture, watches, and clocks - and i can't explain why, or very much about any of them 7. I loved every year i served in the Army National Guard (22 years worth) and wish i was young enough to go back and get even more out of it 8. I have a handful of good friends, but do not know them as well as i would like 9. I prefer the post-apocalyptic genre in movies, books, and games 10. I once had a desire to go into ministry 11. I used to play a medieval battle re-enactment game back in high school known as Dagorhir, and i loved it 12. I enjoy 'silly/predictable' movies (i.e. Mr Baseball, The Princess Diaries, Overboard, etc.) 13. My preferred music type is instrumental celtic folk 14. I wish i had taken the time to learn an instrument, and a foreign language, when i was younger 15. I am deeply in love with my wife 16. The first thing i notice about people is their handshake. I hate to admit it but it's a conscious effort to look people in the eyes, so i notice the tone of their voice and grip first. 17. I met my wife by being set up on a blind date with one of her roommates in college. We spent an entire football game talking about the Sovereignty of God, i didn't catch one play of the game, and don't regret it for a second. 18. I think the greatest sounds on Earth are Thunderstorms and babies laughing. 19. I will not kiss anyone on the mouth except for my wife, and i feel uncomfortable hugging anyone except my family. 20. My favorite smell in all of the world is the smell of my beloved's hair after she's been out side for any length of time. 21. Someone recently asked me if i missed another. Since then i've come to realize that i rarely miss people. I miss the fellowship with people, i miss the communication, i miss the comradery ... but it is rarely i miss an individual. But there have been a handful of times when i have indeed missed my mother (she passed away in December 2000), and my beloved when i was away doing stuff for the National Guard 22. I am a fan of the Carolina Panthers having never lived in that region of the country. 23. I try and use sarcasm, but to be honest... i do not know how to use it very well, nor do i really get it very often. Some of the most "intense moments of fellowship" with my beloved have happened because of sarcasm. 24. I hate to write things. At least with a pen and paper. If i want to take a note i'd much rather have a keyboard and time to type it up and print it out. 25. There are times when i wish i could win/inherit/find a million dollars. Not because i want to run off and buy a mansion, or something like that. I want to set up "self sustaining giving accounts". Accounts that would grow roughly at the rate of inflation, and yet still have enough to give every year to various charities and friends in need. Oh, i'd use some of it. I am not as selfless as this concept would insinuate... ;-) If God ever allowed such a thing i hope to be found true to it. 26. I was able to donate over $100 to Habitat for Humanity last year by raising money with my little candy store. 27. I collect small ceramic/porcelain (and sometimes plastic) country churches. You know, David Winter, Dept. 56, that kind of thing. Just the churches, not all the rest. And those can be sort of hard to find, and usually too expensive. :-) 28. I have an interest in the samurai of feudal Japan, especially those who converted to Christianity, and were subsequently severely persecuted under the Shogunate in the 1600's. There were a lot of atrocities performed - by both sides. 29. My beloved and i sit on opposite sides of the table when we go out to eat on dates. It's not because we don't want to sit next to each other, but because we want to look at each other. 30. My all time favorite player on the Carolina Panthers is their kicker, John Kasay. I like players like Steve Smith, Jon Beason, and Jake Delhomme, but Kasay is the last original Panther, and a devoted Christian. 31. Of all the awards i received during my National Guard career, i am most proud of receiving the Honorable Order of St Barbara. This award is not given lightly, and is not granted to everyone. I have received recognition from post commanders, quite a few state service ribbons, i have even earned the Humanitarian Service Medal (a very close second), but this one is the most special in my heart. Just ahead of the Guideon my unit gave me at my retirement (a close third... what can i say, it was a tight race). 32. I reserve the right to edit this post throughout the rest of today and this weekend. :-) And just because a friend from Facebook posted it, and it is pretty interesting... history of the internet

Misc Ramblings

Ok, it is now Wednesday afternoon... and I have no idea what to write about today.

I am just under 3 months away from my CCNA expiring, and I am beginning to freak out. I don't know what it is... but when I read those huge Cisco Press books my head starts spinning. I can't seem to keep all of the information straight. Once I learn it though, my mind is able to almost visualize a virtual world of how the bits flow through the buffers and access-lists. My employer also has some great training aids through an on-line internal server. But I run into the same problem. But, I need to take advantage of these resources to try and get as much into the cranium as possible.

Only 24 more days in uniform until the season of my National Guard commitment comes to an end. I know I've talked a lot about this recently, but it has encompassed over half of my life and it will soon be coming to an end. Not an unwanted end, but still, an end. I am pretty glad that it is coming to an end on my terms so to speak. I am really shaping things up the way I want to end it, and I am still being a contributing member right up until the end.

I am feeling a tad lonely of late. My beloved as taken a part time job at a local college, and she works evenings. The result is I see her for about 15 minutes in the morning, 15 minutes in the afternoon (if I'm lucky and I don't have to work over any), and then I stay awake until she gets home around 2300 (11pm for you civilians) - we then are so tired we sort of watch a show together and fall asleep. There is not much time left... for now this will only last until May... but I am concerned that I will not be able to provide sufficiently for her to return to being a SAHM like should has told me she wants to be. I've expounded upon this before, so I am not going to do so more here.

My brother is returning home from Iraq this weekend, and we are looking forward to going to see him. He was a part of the group that my unit got assigned to for the deployment so a handful of them will be home also. The rest will be filtering in soon. It will be good to have them home again.

On a totally off of my usual topic, I have been itching to make some models for Necromunda. Every once in a while I get the urge to build these kinds of things, buildings or miniatures (my "little army men" as my beloved refers to them), or sometimes even vehicles. My problem is I make my buildings too symmetrical. The Necro "world" is very much a decrepit, recycled type of atmosphere. I used to spend a lot of time with my lifelong friend from High School, doing these kinds of things. We would sit around, listening to very loud music, sipping highly caffeinated drinks, doing very delicate painting and assembling. I can still visualize a mini that I did that included a fake tree, and a great camouflage pattern. I've long since lost it, but I really liked it. Hmm... I just need to get a small desk/hutch for the corner of my bedroom. Then I'll have a place to play with the models.

That's all I have for random thoughts for today... God bless.
Verse for today:
Psalm 25:1-5, ESV
To you, O Lord, I lift up my soul.
O my God, in you I trust;
let me not be put to shame;
let not my enemies exult over me.
Indeed, none who wait for you shall be put to shame;
they shall be ashamed who are wantonly treacherous.

Make me to know your ways, O Lord;
teach me your paths.
Lead me in your truth and teach me,
for you are the God of my salvation;
for you I wait all the day long.